rate_review Reviews

...I should have spent the day reading for my book club meeting, instead I spent all day reading your fic...
Mmm, lets see, some cliche coming of age story or hot-yummy-Matsumoto-Zaraki-sex-fest with wonderful-obsessive-possessive-all-consumming-love and delicious chunks of good-for-you-drama and roller-coaster-plot?! Yeah, let's just say it wasn't a tough choice! So I only started reading Rangiku fanfiction, because she has only recently become one of my favs, but I hadn't liked any particular ships for her yet. (All I know is that I hate Gin and I won't read any fic that doesn't bash him!) So when I glanced at your description, I thought, 'Well what the hell? Probably just another shallow short PWP, it's not like Zaraki/Matsumoto could work on any literary level.' (Apparently I hadn't noticed the length or the number of reviews you had)
So then I started reading...
...and couldn't stop...not for the life of me...
This is truly wonderful. This seems geniune and real. It burns with love and lust, it's a fanfic jewel! I want to go back and review each chapter, authors of talent should get specific reviews of their work because so much inspiration went into it. (Besides we all know how much reviews help to keep authors writing ; ) It will probably take me some time to go back and review each chapter, because A: I'll get stuck in the story and keep reading even though I should stop and review and B: I loathe simple non personal generic reviews like 'Good job' or 'can't wait for next chap', I prefer to put some though into it. You deserve no less for this lovely and super-smexy fic!
Keep writing your brillance,
Citadel

Wow, I just recently started getting back on a Bleach kick and for some reason the Zaraki/Matsumoto pairing struck me as interesting, so I had to give this a read. I don't normally do long-chaptered stories, but now I'm elated that I did. Wonderful story progression, you do very well at keeping an edgy progression, making me want to read more. I'm very interested in seeing where this ends up!

Wow! Of all things Momo had to tell Rangiku, I was not expecting her to say that her first time was with Ichimaru. Thats just kind of creepy.
But whats this? Toshiro wants Rangiku to deliver a package to Soi Fon, directing into her hands. I wonder if he knows her little secret.

Okay, I know I reviewed this at ff.net but I just love this story. It deserves all the love and praise we can muster because it's so wonderful. Your characterizations, your style, your dialoge...it's all amazing!

like the story, but you really should edit down you dialouge. You'll have Ran or someone say 6 sentences and their message could be conveyed in two.

If I had a knife, I'd stab Momo in her fucking face! She's like the antithesis of all the annoying brown haired bitches that I went to school with. Now Zaraki will come back and step on her eyeballs. Fuck. Now I gotta take a long walk or rob a bank...somewhere to place my anger! Grrr!!! I love how the boys are protecting Matsumoto though, but it figures Momo would do something crazy. I hope they throw her off Sokyoku Hill.

another great chapter thank you I look forward the reading more.

Brilliant story, very well written with some great scenes and i am very interested to see how this goes, keep writing!

Hi,

Thanks a bunch for writting these great stories. With Zaraki (my second favorite character) no less! Heh heh heh... It really feeds the Bleach monkey.

I really enjoy how you portray Zaraki in general, especially in the early chapters of Different Circumstances. He's becoming more verbose as the stoty comes along though...

So, we're long into the story and Zaraki hasn't killed anyone so far, not even bloodied up Kurotsuchi. How come? Give him back his hair trigger. And have Rangiku Matsumoto do something to help him get his Ban Kai.

Japanese names are confusing sometimes, first names are referred to as last names and vice versa.

More descriptions of the settings, please.

Places and settings : keep the setting for edo era Japan : slidding doors, floormats, rarely chairs

Interaction between Captains rocks!

Great dialogue! Tension building is good, paragraphing is usually good too. Grammar and syntax are way above par. You could personalize the dialogue a bit more, using the idiomatic. And you rarely use exclamations (Isn't that a pre-requisite with Zaraki?)

That's it so far.

Keep on writting!

Plot's good. Does Ran really think she can get to Las Noches? I don't see how.