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July 13, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Ah, this seems to have alot of potential indeed, it's not a pairing I would have imagined but I think it will make for a great storyline. I think there are alot of Gin/Aizen pairings which I think are mostly consensual, I must admit that my curiosity is peaked at a potential submissive role for Gin to someone other than Aizen.
One thing I wanted to point out, though I suspect you may already realize this. In one of the paragraghs, you mentioned that Gin would have to open his eyes in order to roll them. Well even though it appears his eyes are closed, we the viewers are to assume they are merely narrowed so tightly we can not see his pupils. We can blame this on poor drawing of the character. The few times it seemed to us that he "opened" his eyes, was merely him widening his eyelids. I wasn't sure if you were going to write this entirely under the concept that he walks around with his eyes closed.
Either way, great first chapter, I look forward to the next chapter where hopefully Byakuya will begin mixing it up with Gin. ;)
One thing I wanted to point out, though I suspect you may already realize this. In one of the paragraghs, you mentioned that Gin would have to open his eyes in order to roll them. Well even though it appears his eyes are closed, we the viewers are to assume they are merely narrowed so tightly we can not see his pupils. We can blame this on poor drawing of the character. The few times it seemed to us that he "opened" his eyes, was merely him widening his eyelids. I wasn't sure if you were going to write this entirely under the concept that he walks around with his eyes closed.
Either way, great first chapter, I look forward to the next chapter where hopefully Byakuya will begin mixing it up with Gin. ;)
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July 12, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Loved it! I'm a huge Ichimaru fan and I enjoyed this immensely. Please continue this. It is a very original idea. Can't wait for the next chap. I'll be keeping an eye out for it!
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July 11, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Oh Gin, please don't get yourself killed you are way to awesome a character to just let go:)
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July 11, 2008 at 12:00 AM
This is rather good, she's very interested to see how this will turn out.
There are a few issues with dialogue and speech affectations - Gin's accent needs some work.
You have a poetic writing style, which is very enjoyable to read and flows very well.
She can't wait for the update!
There are a few issues with dialogue and speech affectations - Gin's accent needs some work.
You have a poetic writing style, which is very enjoyable to read and flows very well.
She can't wait for the update!