schedule
April 26, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Give
Me
More.
Right now.
WHY DO YOU STARTS SUCH GREAT STORIES BUT JUST LEAVE THEM!?
Me
More.
Right now.
WHY DO YOU STARTS SUCH GREAT STORIES BUT JUST LEAVE THEM!?
schedule
December 19, 2008 at 12:00 AM
First of all, she really isn't an 'OC' person. She's never really been fond of people adding their own characters into fanfiction. This said, she found that she really didn't mind your OC's. Your Mistress of Darkness was rather charming, and well described.
However, your canon characters need some work. Namely Chad and Orihime, are noticeably OOC. She couldn't really imagine Orihime being the overtly, boy crazy type, and she seems a little too 'extroverted'. Orihime was by no means a recluse, but she did tend to be a little more reserved with people she hadn't met, rather than clinging on to their arm and flirting. That seems a little more Chizuru (if Rai happened to be a hot chick!) And Chad seems more talkative than his canon counterpart. You did, however, do a good job on Ichigo, especially the prickly way he comes off on strangers.
Your writing style is refreshing and very amusing. It made her giggle. It's very upbeat and cheerful, and it really was a delight to read.
Anyway, she's rather enjoying this fiction, and she would love to see it updated.
However, your canon characters need some work. Namely Chad and Orihime, are noticeably OOC. She couldn't really imagine Orihime being the overtly, boy crazy type, and she seems a little too 'extroverted'. Orihime was by no means a recluse, but she did tend to be a little more reserved with people she hadn't met, rather than clinging on to their arm and flirting. That seems a little more Chizuru (if Rai happened to be a hot chick!) And Chad seems more talkative than his canon counterpart. You did, however, do a good job on Ichigo, especially the prickly way he comes off on strangers.
Your writing style is refreshing and very amusing. It made her giggle. It's very upbeat and cheerful, and it really was a delight to read.
Anyway, she's rather enjoying this fiction, and she would love to see it updated.
schedule
December 18, 2008 at 12:00 AM
hehehehehehehehe I think that about covers it XD
The beginning reminded me of Terry Pratchetts disc world books, the Gods playing with the fates of mankind, and that kinda drew me in.
I love the fighting at the end, he and Ichi are going to cause real problems and that could be so much fun for us.
The beginning reminded me of Terry Pratchetts disc world books, the Gods playing with the fates of mankind, and that kinda drew me in.
I love the fighting at the end, he and Ichi are going to cause real problems and that could be so much fun for us.