rate_review Reviews

It's quite good. I liked how you kept everyone in character and true to the canon with their personalities, and the way you had your narrator directly address the reader was very unique and quite an interesting technique, it worked well because although it's technically breaking the fourth wall it actually drew the reader in more rather than alienating them, something hard to do :)

That said, I do think your grammar needs a lot of work. The story was very jarring at times, because it was hard to follow or simply didn't feel 'right' with the grammar misuses, which is a shame because it has so much potential and is otherwise pretty good. It's clear that you enjoy Bleach though, and I do look forward to seeing more works from you in the future, you have potential :)