rate_review Reviews

OK. I was hoping for some steamy action. BUT I'm super impressed. I love how you used Zaraki too, very clever. I've never left a review before. But this deserved one. Thanks for the read.

This has to be my very favorite fiction with these two of all time. I can read and reread it, and can't get enough of it...from beginning to end, and especially the satisfying ending without making someone die. I'm so glad you decided to share this!

Awww, what a beautiful story! I'd hoped for some smut but it's still lovely. :) Such powerful emotions. Thanks!

I loved this story. It was so heart wrenching and beautiful.

I loved this story, such a sad and sweet story

Yay! Finally! :D Thanks so much. There were some problems with punctuation, but that was really all I noticed.

Ah, the kiss of true love brings the heartbroken back from the brink of death and despair. It's a Fairytale, but it's very ... comforting, the way you expect it to be. The build up of anxiety and fear melts away when two green eyes restore the balance. I had a big smile and sense of well-being at the end of this chapter. I'm almost tempted to say that you could leave it there but I would have to spank myself for such thoughts. I need to know what they say to each other, I need to know how their relationship changes.

I didn't feel the revelation was rushed in the long view, meaning, if I read the preceding chapter together with this one, the arrival of Shun's confession comes in time to still my squirming need for resolution. The fact that you separated the scene into two chapters for a cliffhanger, might make this one look like it happened too fast though, because the tension you built in the last isn't readily present in the reader at the beginning of the new chapter. You know what I mean? My emotions had time to calm and couldn't be built back up to the same degree with only this chapter, so I had to reread the preceding one to get there again.

I'm not a big fan of cliffhangers in general for the reasons I describe above. I'm not able to sustain the same level of interest and emotion from the cliff to the ledge below. I still want to find out what happened, but my investment is diminished. That is not the same as waiting for plot development. That can make my curiosity soar to create much excitement at the beginning of a new chapter. The key difference is probably when the scene is cut. I'm no expert as to timing and I may be guilty of my own cliffies, especially when urged on by readers who like it.

I guess, having expressed my thoughts about this to you, I've reaffirmed my position in my own mind. I'm grateful that your story made me think about it in depth. I don't want you to think there is anything wrong with the way you unveiled your pivotal moments. That is for you to decide as the writer. My enjoyment of your stories continues to be at a higher level than most. I can feel the difference in my appreciation and I only hope I can convey some of it to you, to fill your own sea.

I was just thinking about this story today! Glad to see that you updated and the confession finally happened!! Can't wait for the next chapter.

It did feel a tiny bit rushed, however, in situations where someone is on the verge of life and death the feel of time changes. A minute can seem like an eternity or an hour can feel like no more than a second. All that mattered was the feel of desperation Shunsui had in what he felt would be Jushiro's last moments.
This was a good chapter and thank you for updating. As for not getting the chapter up because of laziness, well, I can't really say anything because I'm procrastinating on one of my stories. So, instead I'll pray for a speedy update. :)

Chap 8: I read this as soon as you posted, and now when I come back to read and review, you have an edit. I'm not sure where but ... am I mistaken? Did you have Shunsui think, "I love you too" at the end? Or was I imagining that? It could be from another story, you know. Anyway, Shun ultimately said, "It didn't matter anymore", I don't think it matters, either, because I like the ending. It's like you're putting off the moment when he reveals his feelings, maybe for when Jushiro is recovered? I know you're trying to worry us that the possibility of Ju dying is real, but I just can't accept that. Not from you. If you let that happen, I would have to give you twenty lashings! Looking forward to how you bring them back together, even if it's just to reconnect as best friends.