Darkest Blue

Chapter 12: The Cave

"It's empty in the valley of your heart

The sun, it rises slowly as you walk

Away from all the fears, and all the faults you've left behind…

But I will hold on hope

And I won't let you choke

On the noose around your neck

And I'll find strength in pain

And I will change my ways

So come out of your cave walking on your hands

And see the world hanging upside down..."

- Mumford & Sons

Waking up in the mornings was most definitely not Urahara's favourite part of the day (he used to joke with Isshin that the real reason for his defection was so that he had the freedom to sleep as late as he wished) but as he grudgingly opened his eyes he thought that he could get used to walking up next to a shock of orange hair with that warm body still snuggled in his arms.

Noise filtered in through the window, intruding upon their lazy solitude. The general hubbub coming from outside told Urahara the location of Ururu and Jinta, who had been warned not to disturb Ichigo on pain of punishment, and he knew that Tessai would be outside too, checking and doing everything he could to strengthen the spells and kidou's that formed the protective net over the shop, the net that would probably prove useless if Aizen himself decided to pay a visit, but which should be fairly effective against the lower level arrancars and (hopefully) the espada.

Renji and Rukia had been hanging around too, mainly out of concern for Ichigo but also partially as a means of hiding out from Soul Society. Even though everything had gone to plan this time, Urahara knew that the captain-commander was sure to be pissed, and none of them wanted to be around for the telling off. But they'd gone back to face the music a few days ago. Soifon had done likewise, muttering some dark threats at Urahara as she left. Orihime had left too, after staying at the shop for over a week she said that she wanted to go home, despite the protests of the others. But she was adamant in the way that only a homesick girl can be and she'd been allowed to leave, along with Yoruichi who had been posted as her guard until things seemed safer.

Urahara did a quick sweep of his memory and, as far as he knew, all the freeloaders had left. With the kids and Tessai outside that left him and Ichigo alone together in the shop for what must've been the first time since his return. Which also meant that he could catch a few more winks in bed before anybody came along to disturb them. In another life the thought of taking advantage of the redhead in his bed would have crossed his mind, but he knew that to do such a thing now was out of the question.

'Goddamn you Aizen you sick bastard.' He silently cursed the cause of Ichigo's nightmares and bit his lip as the familiar rage twisted in his stomach. He didn't even realise how worked up he was getting until he felt Ichigo stir in his arms and mutter,

'Your reiatsu is turning dark.' He yawned, still half asleep but unusually perceptive. He'd been like that ever since he'd gotten back. 'Please don't get angry…' and Urahara caught the unspoken meaning 'It upsets me.'

'Sorry.' He murmured against the back of Ichigo's head, nuzzling his nose into orange strands. Ichigo gave a deep, sleepy sigh and rolled over in his arms to face him. Urahara smiled at the half awake shinigami and greeted him with a short, soft touch of lips and an equally sleepy, 'Good morning.'

'Mmm.' Ichigo's eyes fluttered at the feel of the older man's lips. 'Morning. Man, I slept well.'

'Really?' He smirked against Ichigo's skin. 'I would've thought that having a handsome, yet obtrusive, shopkeeper in your bed would've made sleeping more difficult for you.'

'Haha.' Ichigo made no attempt to disguise the sarcasm in his voice. 'No actually it was the opposite.'

'Glad to hear it.' And he was. The nightmares would probably never completely dissipate, and if they did it would take a lot more time and healing, but one night free of the terrors was a small but significant victory in Ichigo's recovery.

'You know what that means though?' Ichigo mused. 'It means that you're gonna have to stay here every night…'

'I think that is something I could live with…' Urahara winced a little as he hinted at an issue that they really needed to discuss at some point. 'Your father however may not be so open to that concept…'

'Tch.' Ichigo made a small noise of annoyance, before breaking out in a smile. 'Oh I can just imagine the look on his face…'

'Yeah, right before he'd come at me brandishing a sword. No thanks, I'd like to keep my chiselled features.' Ichigo snorted, the closest thing to a laugh he'd heard from the boy in weeks. Talking about Isshin gave Urahara another quick stab of conscience to his gut, but he reminded himself that it was too late; he was in too deep now. They both were.

And he really didn't want to know how Isshin would react when he discovered that his oldest friend (emphasis on 'oldest') was seducing his emotionally damaged son.

The sun rose higher in the sky, creeping through the blinds and shining in as he felt Ichigo stretch against him and yawn sleepily.

'We should get up.' Ichigo muttered, drowsily changing the subject.

'You're probably right…' Urahara hummed gently and proposed, 'Five more minutes?'

'Thought you'd never ask.' Ichigo mumbled as his eyes slipped shut again.

The room was warm and peaceful and neither of them was in any kind of hurry to get out of bed. It wasn't until Tessai stuck his head around the door, raising no eyebrows at discovering his employer and his patient in bed together, and informed them that not only had they slept through breakfast, they were liable to sleep through lunch as well if they did not shake a leg. Even then it was begrudgingly that they rose from the warm confines of the bed, Ichigo looking better and acting cheerier and more like his old self than he had since the day Urahara watched him stride into the abysmal mouth of the garganta, into hell itself. Gazing affectionately at the redhead with the light back in his eyes, he smiled a face splitting smile and wondered if perhaps, just this once, everything would be allowed to work out alright.

---

Later in the day, when the sun was just starting to turn to begin its slow descent into the earth, a soft knock on the shop door announced the arrival of Orihime and Yoruichi. She bounced in looking none the worse for wear after her ordeal, followed closely by her purple haired guard. Urahara smiled as he shooed the girl down to the training grounds where Ichigo was recapping upon basic training with Chad and Ishida as the first steps towards regaining his strength. The jovial expression on his face hardened somewhat as he turned to Yoruichi, his eyes full of questions and his face set in an uncharacteristically grim expression.

Down below them, Orihime descended into the vast, desert like training grounds where Ichigo had first entered the world of the hollows, and immediately spotted the three boys lying atop one of the numerous great rocks which littered the area. They were taking a short break from training as, despite the adrenaline that shot through his veins at the pleasantly familiar sensation of exercise, Ichigo wasn't faring too well. Ever since the flight from Las Noches, he had possessed barely enough strength to lift a sword. The basic exercises he was running through with Ishida and Chad were helping, and he was getting his strength back, but it was a frustratingly slow process, especially for the redhead who was so used to rushing through these types of things.

He stood up again, Urahara kept reminding him that that was what was important, that he kept standing back up, and wrenched Zangetsu from where he stuck lazily in the ground.

'C'mon Chad.' He gestured towards the muscle bound boy as he stood, 'Let's see how improved these arms of yours are.'

Orihime and Ishida sat on the picnic blanket that she had brought, nibbling on biscuits and drinking iced tea while the two warriors ran around below them, chasing each other around and around like siblings playfighting.

'Kurosaki-kun seems a lot better.' Orihime commented, her face cheery as always but her voice edged with the worry that Ishida noticed was always present when she was talking about Ichigo.

'Yes.' Ishida remained a man of few words. 'He does.'

'I'm glad.' She chewed at her lower lip for a moment before continuing, 'I don't know what they did to him, but I know that it was so much worse than how they treated me.' Guilt was clear in her eyes, and despite himself Ishida couldn't help but curse Ichigo for making her worry so.

'That's because Kurosaki is more difficult to manipulate…' Ishida murmured, 'No offence intended.' He added, suddenly worried that he was only making things worse. 'He's not as kind hearted as you, you know.'

'Oh I don't know about that.' Orihime looked like she was on the verge of tears again. 'That's why I simply have to get stronger, so that nobody has to go through something like that to protect me. Kurosaki- kun is always protecting me…' Ishida felt a stab of jealousy until she added, 'And so are you. All of you are always getting hurt because of me.' She turned towards Ishida, eyes shining with tears which she would not let fall. 'That's why I have to get stronger, so that I can protect the people I love…'

She broke off mid-sentence, her face colouring as she looked away, as though worried that she was about to betray some secret. Ishida smiled gently at her, sweet little Orihime, and placed his hand over her own pale white one, squeezing gently as a reassurance. They sat in silence like that for a while, each contemplating their own thoughts, each making silent promises to each other.

When Ichigo and Chad had finished tearing around beneath them, they headed back upstairs to rouse the others, pretending not to notice that Orihime and Ishida were still holding hands. After crawling up through the trapdoor they were surprised to find the usually noisy upper half of the shop quiet and almost lifeless. Ichigo's hairs stood on end and his hand flew to Zangetsu's hilt, resting there until he heard the unmistakeable voice of Yamamoto coming from down the hallway, presumably from the room where Urahara kept that ridiculous looking television type device that allowed them to communicate with Soul Society. They made a silent, joint decision that none of them particularly wanted to be involved with that conversation, Ichigo least of all, and tiptoed the opposite way off down the corridor to the shop's messy but spacious kitchen. Safely inside with the door slid shut, Ichigo shook the dust from his hair and announced that he was going to go put himself back into his body and take a long, hot bath. Bidding goodbye to his friends, he slunk off again down the corridor in the direction of the bathroom.

Despite his animosity towards the Captain Commander, Ichigo couldn't help but be intrigued by what was happening in the meeting room, as well as slightly irritated but grateful that he was being left out of it. And so, doing his best to cloak his reiatsu, he crept quietly closer to the slightly open door from which emanated several familiar voices.

'You can't be serious!' It was Urahara, his voice low but filled with hurt anger.

'There's no other option.' Yamamoto's deep rumbling tones; Ichigo could never mistake that voice.

'I hate to admit it, but the Captain Commander is right… He's the only one who even has a chance at getting close to the basta- to Aizen.' Unmistakably Yoruichi.

Ichigo felt the hairs on the nape of his neck stand on end, and his fingers itched to grasp his sword just as his feet longed to run from that place.

'But we can't possibly ask him to do that, not after everything that's happened…' He heard Urahara let out a pained sigh and he somehow knew the wounded expression that was twisting his face without even having to look. 'How can we ask him to lead the charge, how can we possibly expect him to face Aizen alone?'

'Maybe you should take a step back. You're too emotionally invested Kisuke.' Yoruichi meant well, but Urahara could've cursed her for bringing that subject up in front of the others.

'Maybe I am. But right now it seems that I'm the only one who actually still gives a damn about him.' He scowled again at the figures on the screen above him; Yamamoto was flanked by his two favourites Shunsui and Ukitake. Seated around the table in the room Urahara was joined by the cat lady and her consort Soifon, along with captains Byakuya and the snow haired Hitsugaya, and the shopkeeper was beginning to feel distinctly cornered and crowded. 'And I cannot ask him to do this. You have no idea what he's been through, Gods, he's just a kid!'

'And he's still our best chance, perhaps our only chance of winning this war.' Yamamoto grumbled.

Ichigo's heart leap into his throat and he decided that he really didn't want to hear any more of the conversation, not this way. He fled as slyly as he could, his heart pounding as he held his hands over his mouth, the remnants of his lunch meal trying to force its way out of his stomach.

'I'm sorry Kisuke… I know what he means to you.' Yoruichi always knew, but there was little she could do to comfort him.

In the meeting room Urahara scowled at the Captain Commander and held his head in his hands as the screen went blank and the visitors departed, each with a heart a little heavier than when they had arrived.

Ichigo sunk into the bath, his heart and his head still pounding and fluttering. He felt bile in his throat from his now empty stomach and was ashamed at his reaction. He would have to face him again, but how could he do that when he couldn't even hear his name without vomiting? He sunk lower into the soapy water and wondered if fate would ever allow him to escape his captivity.