Stranger Than Fiction
folder
Bleach › Het - Male/Female
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
6
Views:
2,678
Reviews:
7
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Bleach › Het - Male/Female
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
6
Views:
2,678
Reviews:
7
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Bleach, nor do I make any money from writing this
Chapter 2
A/N: I came up with this idea a while back, and thought it had the potential to be hilarious and of course, allow me to write smut! Yay smut!
I do not own Bleach.
Warnings: This fiction will contain one or more of the following - adult situations, eventual graphic porn, bad shoujo manga, angry Nanaos, virginal Jyuushiros, and scheming Shunsuis. If you are bothered by any of this, please hit your "back" button now.
***SS***
Jyuushiro took his time getting back to Seireitei, wandering though the back streets of the Rukon district and occasionally stopping at a vendors stall to look at the wares with lifeless eyes. He was emotionally drained from his meeting with Ryo and he was losing something that he considered a piece of his spirit for so long.
Sure, he might be able to take "Sogyo no Okotowari" to another publisher for the time being, but he knew that if he got an advance, it would be miniscule, and with the recession he might not be able to get royalties at all. It was best to let Sogyo be until things picked up again.
When he arrived back in Seireitei, Jyuu expanded his senses to find Shunsui. He needed to discuss his other problem, the agreement he foolishly signed in regards to the adult literature. He was disappointed in himself too, as a captain of the Goeti 13 he knew better than to act rashly, but the minute his emotions got strained, all coherent thought flew out the window. Like it always did.
He sighed and tried to locate Shunsui again to no avail. He was hiding again, but Nanao was in the library and she had Kyoraku-radar. He smiled. Even if Shunsui was slacking off in a room made of Seki Seki Stone, Nanao could still find him. She was good like that.
With that last thought, Jyuu started heading toward the library. He could ask Nanao where Shunsui was, and he could check out some – he suppressed a shudder – romance books to see what he was up against.
***SS***
Nanao tried to adjust herself in the uncomfortable wooden chair again. She was reading one of the Heian-era copies of "The Tale of Genji" and there was no way in hell the library was going to allow her anywhere more comfortable to sit, lest she ruin the delicate scrollwork. While she technically could pick up one of the newer adaptations from the shelves out front and be allowed to take the book home, there was just something better about reading the old works without the modern slang thrown in. She didn't want her ancient smutty literature dumbed down.
She was about to get to her absolute favorite part, complete with a Shunga woodblock depicting the scene. A woman had cruelly rejected Genji's advances, so he instead decided to sleep with her young attractive brother…
"Hello Nanao! Do you know where Shunsui is?"
A figurative bucket of cold water was thrown over her head. Nanao scowled, counted backwards from ten, tried not to crinkle the edges of the scroll in a fit, and thought about her options. If she kido'd the hell out of Captain Ukitake she could possibly be arrested for treason and never allowed in the library again. It was almost worth the risk. Almost.
Instead she settled for answering any questions he might have quickly and glaring small daggers at the clueless captain. Maybe, just maybe, he would get the message he was interrupting and she could go back to her historical yaoi session. That was wishful thinking. Ukitake was, if anything, ridiculously oblivious at times.
"Hello Captain Ukitake. Captain Kyoraku is at the first division for a budgetary meeting." She adjusted her glasses, "It seems that the Captain-Commander has noticed a discrepancy with 27-a, the entertainment form. Needless to say, he will be held up for some time."
"He drank all the entertainment money again, didn't he?" Ukitake pulled out a chair and sat down across from her.
Just her luck, he wasn't going to leave right away. She settled on an inaudible sigh. "Of course he did. Is there something you need help with?" He was looking uncomfortable about something.
"Yes, I suppose I do need some help. Can you recommend any good romance novels or literature of an adult nature?"
Nanao blinked, mentally shook her head, and blinked again. Was Captain Ukitake asking her to recommend smut? This is wrong; he should be in the children's section looking at picture books. There was so much wrongness with this situation, Ukitake should not, under any circumstances, ever be asking anyone about anything adult natured.
Buying time while pretending to think of good books, she pondered how the hell she was going to get out of this situation. Flash stepping away would not only be rude, but if she didn't put the scroll back perfectly she could be banned from reading it again. Not worth taking her chances. She decided that she was going to have to answer his question if she ever wanted to get a moments peace. What would be a good way to introduce romance to a man that still uses coloring books?
"You could try shoujo manga section up front, it's a good primer before you get into the more adult romance titles. Um, they have pictures."
***SS***
Reviews motivate me to continue. Hint, hint. ;)
I do not own Bleach.
Warnings: This fiction will contain one or more of the following - adult situations, eventual graphic porn, bad shoujo manga, angry Nanaos, virginal Jyuushiros, and scheming Shunsuis. If you are bothered by any of this, please hit your "back" button now.
***SS***
Jyuushiro took his time getting back to Seireitei, wandering though the back streets of the Rukon district and occasionally stopping at a vendors stall to look at the wares with lifeless eyes. He was emotionally drained from his meeting with Ryo and he was losing something that he considered a piece of his spirit for so long.
Sure, he might be able to take "Sogyo no Okotowari" to another publisher for the time being, but he knew that if he got an advance, it would be miniscule, and with the recession he might not be able to get royalties at all. It was best to let Sogyo be until things picked up again.
When he arrived back in Seireitei, Jyuu expanded his senses to find Shunsui. He needed to discuss his other problem, the agreement he foolishly signed in regards to the adult literature. He was disappointed in himself too, as a captain of the Goeti 13 he knew better than to act rashly, but the minute his emotions got strained, all coherent thought flew out the window. Like it always did.
He sighed and tried to locate Shunsui again to no avail. He was hiding again, but Nanao was in the library and she had Kyoraku-radar. He smiled. Even if Shunsui was slacking off in a room made of Seki Seki Stone, Nanao could still find him. She was good like that.
With that last thought, Jyuu started heading toward the library. He could ask Nanao where Shunsui was, and he could check out some – he suppressed a shudder – romance books to see what he was up against.
***SS***
Nanao tried to adjust herself in the uncomfortable wooden chair again. She was reading one of the Heian-era copies of "The Tale of Genji" and there was no way in hell the library was going to allow her anywhere more comfortable to sit, lest she ruin the delicate scrollwork. While she technically could pick up one of the newer adaptations from the shelves out front and be allowed to take the book home, there was just something better about reading the old works without the modern slang thrown in. She didn't want her ancient smutty literature dumbed down.
She was about to get to her absolute favorite part, complete with a Shunga woodblock depicting the scene. A woman had cruelly rejected Genji's advances, so he instead decided to sleep with her young attractive brother…
"Hello Nanao! Do you know where Shunsui is?"
A figurative bucket of cold water was thrown over her head. Nanao scowled, counted backwards from ten, tried not to crinkle the edges of the scroll in a fit, and thought about her options. If she kido'd the hell out of Captain Ukitake she could possibly be arrested for treason and never allowed in the library again. It was almost worth the risk. Almost.
Instead she settled for answering any questions he might have quickly and glaring small daggers at the clueless captain. Maybe, just maybe, he would get the message he was interrupting and she could go back to her historical yaoi session. That was wishful thinking. Ukitake was, if anything, ridiculously oblivious at times.
"Hello Captain Ukitake. Captain Kyoraku is at the first division for a budgetary meeting." She adjusted her glasses, "It seems that the Captain-Commander has noticed a discrepancy with 27-a, the entertainment form. Needless to say, he will be held up for some time."
"He drank all the entertainment money again, didn't he?" Ukitake pulled out a chair and sat down across from her.
Just her luck, he wasn't going to leave right away. She settled on an inaudible sigh. "Of course he did. Is there something you need help with?" He was looking uncomfortable about something.
"Yes, I suppose I do need some help. Can you recommend any good romance novels or literature of an adult nature?"
Nanao blinked, mentally shook her head, and blinked again. Was Captain Ukitake asking her to recommend smut? This is wrong; he should be in the children's section looking at picture books. There was so much wrongness with this situation, Ukitake should not, under any circumstances, ever be asking anyone about anything adult natured.
Buying time while pretending to think of good books, she pondered how the hell she was going to get out of this situation. Flash stepping away would not only be rude, but if she didn't put the scroll back perfectly she could be banned from reading it again. Not worth taking her chances. She decided that she was going to have to answer his question if she ever wanted to get a moments peace. What would be a good way to introduce romance to a man that still uses coloring books?
"You could try shoujo manga section up front, it's a good primer before you get into the more adult romance titles. Um, they have pictures."
***SS***
Reviews motivate me to continue. Hint, hint. ;)