The wisdom of a stray dog
folder
Bleach › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
6
Views:
4,743
Reviews:
18
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Bleach › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
6
Views:
4,743
Reviews:
18
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Bleach, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
The Runaway
Author’s Note: Yaoi, a bitter one. British spelling and vocabulary, as usual. Definitely not the last chapter – I have planned two more. Please, tell me whether you like this story up until now or not – I’ll be very grateful for all the feedback, that is. Had to change the rating due to the descriptions – I could not resist them.
Characters/Pairings: Byakuya x Renji, Rukia, Unohana Retsu x Zaraki Kenpachi
Summary: WAFF? Me jus’ still disnae ken how long you lot will have to wait for something like that in this story. As for now, Byakuya is confused, and this confusion leads to making wrong choices.
Word count: 1349 (oh!)
Rating: Decisively NC-17, but without violence or blood.
Disclaimer: BLEACH is not mine. This story is just a fan fiction.
Music: “I Am a Rock” Simon & Garfunkel; “Love is Blindness” U2; “Rush” Paula Abdul; “Separate Lives” Phil Collins
Dedication: For Lena and for all people who wish for more than just a happy ending stories. Bless ye all, geezers and ladies!
Motto: I wandered lonely as a cloud/That floats on high o’er vales and hills – William Wordsworth “The Inward Eye”
THE RUNAWAY
“I am a rock,
I am an island.
I’ve built walls,
A fortress deep and mighty,
That none may penetrate.”
‘And yet... Was it truly my own regret or have I been merely following the lines which tradition and law drew for me to go along? But if I cannot obey the law, who shall obey? What do I really need?’
Some small string (or maybe was it a neuron or synapse, it was too difficult to differ between them right now) snapped within Kuchiki heir’s soul, making it even more hard for him to concentrate. He tried in vain to find the right way to respond...
“Alright, Renji. I shall do what you request.” Byakuya said simply, hardly believing his own words.
The drunken, arrogant grin on Renji’s face turned into a loving, warm, considerate smile, the auburn gaze softened noticeably.
“Oi, taichou, finally. Talk to me, touch me, look at me – please...” Abarai was almost begging on his knees, something very unusual, considering Renji’s competitive and courageous ego.
Byakuya, promising silently to himself that it would but be just a quick glance, looked at the redhead and momentarily lost all rational thoughts. Leaning towards Renji, he wrapped his arm around Abarai’s waist and pulled his subordinate up, kissing him hungrily and less and less deliberately. Taking the linen haori off Renji’s shoulders, he touched the tattooed, silky smooth skin, beneath which life had been pulsating so strongly, radiating it’s warmth and energy into Abarai’s reiatsu that currently surrounded Byakuya like a sunglow, making it possible for the wounds to heal, for memory to forget the pain and sadness of the soul to disappear. He took Renji’s palms in his, placing soft, delicate kisses on the inner side of them, and then on the wrists, in the place where the pulse could be traced. Byakuya felt somehow overjoyed, light-hearted and relieved, his instinct telling him to follow the path he had entered. Nipping at Renji’s shoulders and chest, Byakuya’s lips involuntarily went along tattoo lines, slowly reaching the muscular abdomen and hard, almost fully erected penis. Gently, almost reluctantly, he unfolded the silky, fragile glands from the foreskin, stroking the delicate, thin strip of the skin, provocatively licking it afterwards and watching the colour of the glands change... He felt Renji’s hand clench on his shoulder, the other running down his back, scratching, bruising the porcelain skin with sharp, hard nails.
It had been a momentarily made decision – there was no turning back, no place for hesitation, for doubt or shame... Byakuya knelt, bent his head, his back turned towards Renji, who gave a surprised, wordless cry.
“Is that what ye want, taichou...?” He whispered, voice hoarse, barley audible.
“Come, Renji...” Byakuya murmured. “Just... do it, Renji. Don’t ask questions... Come to me...”
Renji did as he was told, both overwhelmed and enthralled by his lover’s directness. First slowly, then faster, touching, changing rhythm and speed, teasing and caressing, the redhead sent his beloved over the edge, making him loose control utterly, his breath shallow, irregular... The whole world exploded... or so it seemed.
“A little death
Without mourning
No call
And no warning
Baby...a dangerous idea
That almost makes sense”
“I luv ye so much, taichou... You’re so beautiful, my black-haired angel of death!” Renji exclaimed, burying his hands in black strands, kissing the shapely, pale neck in a passionate caress. “I luv ye, always have...” And then he came, screaming Byakuya’s name, an extrovert, impatient, magenta coloured spark, emotional, willingly and wholeheartedly giving all that he had. Exposed, vulnerable his heart had been at this very moment...
“I’m gonna run, I’m gonna try
I’m gonna take this love
Right to ya
All my heart, all the joy
Oh baby, baby please”
Byakuya flew into this warmth and tenderness like a moth to the flame, feeling the sudden urge to melt, to literally become one with Renji and never go back to his so-valued solitude and independence... Abarai’s arms were wrapped around him, he felt safe, he felt loved and accepted. So peaceful, so warm, so familiar...
Waking up in the morning was like loosing a beautiful dream: the remorse and sense of guilt overflew Byakuya’s reason and hit him where it hurt, with all the power they’ve had. No amount of warmth radiating from sleeping Renji, not even the feeling of his arm wrapped protectively around Kuchiki’s waist could beguile them. No joy was left, just plain disgust. Towards his own self. For being so silly to do the things he had done the previous night. But he felt loved...
‘No, this is wrong. There is no safety within love, it only maketh one vulnerable and weak! No emotion has the value equal to the value of law, of order, of duty and responsibility. If there had been no law, the whole world would have collapsed, broken into pieces, peace and life destroyed forever.’
“Don’t talk of love,
But I’ve heard the words before;
It’s sleeping in my memory.
I won’t disturb the slumber of feelings that have died.
If I never loved I never would have cried.
I am a rock,
I am an island.”
And so Byakuya got up from the futon, put his robes on and left Renji still sleeping among the white sheets. 'It shall not happen again – I will keep my promise this time, I swear I will'.
Back to his old self again, he proceeded to follow the daily routine. The only disturbing fact is that he could not look Renji in the eyes and had to set his sight on something else instead. But he can get used to that. The alternative is unacceptable, unthinkable. Cold, unemotional, reasonable, responsible – that is what he is like. Responsible, dutiful, distant. A very appropriate description, indeed. Renji seemed startled at first, then he tried to brake his taichou’s stoic façade, stubbornly and strenuously knocking on the closed door. Byakuya was unwilling to respond. However, why did he still experience pain deep inside his heart?
In the evening of sixth day Byakuya decided to go and ask captain Unohana for help. She asked him to take a seat and examined him carefully.
“Nothing seems to be wrong with your vascular system, Kuchiki-taichou. Your heart is in perfect condition as well. Therefore, I assume that it most likely a problem of a psychological nature. Would you care to tell me what is troubling you, Kuchiki-san?” the sapphire-eyed woman asked calmly.
“I think there is no reason why I should not... Being torn between duty and your own feelings may be destructive, Unohana-taichou. I don’t know what to choose, what to do anymore...” Byakuya replied, looking at her with an enormous amount of sadness in his eyes.
“And what would you like to choose, Kuchiki-taichou? Is there anything you might need to make your choice easier?”
“To be honest, I would have been a relief to get rid of my nobility for a while, just to see how it is when one can make one’s own choices...” Byakuya said, even more confused than at the beginning of conversation.
“One is always capable of doing that, Kuchiki-taichou. If one has a strong heart, one can do anything one wants. You only have to let yourself think that way” Unohana replied, smiling faintly. “If you are in love with the person whose name I have in my mind currently, then trust that person, believe in what you have already built”
“Then, Unohana-san, do you think that we could be truly happy together?” Byakuya asked.
“Yes, I think you could” Unohana Retsu stated, embracing Zaraki Kenpachi, who had just entered the room and kissed her on the cheek.
***
Renji gave up hope. It was so naïve to think that anything would change: it was time for him to leave.
***
“Have you seen Renji, Rukia? I have been looking all over for him and haven’t found him yet... Not to mention there is no sign of his reiatsu as well...” Byakuya asked his sister, the anxiety rapidly rising within his soul.
“I’m afraid not, nii-sama...” Rukia sighed. “I suppose he has left us. He had made his decision, nii-sama. I don’t know why, but currently he’s purposefully suppressing his reiatsu, hiding his energy. He doesn’t want to be found, he doesn’t want any of us looking for him... Nii-sama, did anything happen recently? Have Renji told you that someone had wounded him or that he had done something inexcusable, unforgivable? Do you have any idea why he had left Zabimaru in Soul Society?”
Byakuya was speechless. He stood there, before his delicate-looking, little sister, a married, loving woman, the mother of his nephew - and just stared at her, feeling ashamed, small and stupid, and inexperienced. She seemed to know everything, and he... he was an old, ridiculous clown, pretending to be someone.
“So you build that wall (build that wall)
Yes, you build that wall (build that wall)
And you make it stronger”
(...)
“But for now, we’ll go on living separate lives
Yes for now, we’ll go on living separate lives
Separate lives”
Characters/Pairings: Byakuya x Renji, Rukia, Unohana Retsu x Zaraki Kenpachi
Summary: WAFF? Me jus’ still disnae ken how long you lot will have to wait for something like that in this story. As for now, Byakuya is confused, and this confusion leads to making wrong choices.
Word count: 1349 (oh!)
Rating: Decisively NC-17, but without violence or blood.
Disclaimer: BLEACH is not mine. This story is just a fan fiction.
Music: “I Am a Rock” Simon & Garfunkel; “Love is Blindness” U2; “Rush” Paula Abdul; “Separate Lives” Phil Collins
Dedication: For Lena and for all people who wish for more than just a happy ending stories. Bless ye all, geezers and ladies!
Motto: I wandered lonely as a cloud/That floats on high o’er vales and hills – William Wordsworth “The Inward Eye”
THE RUNAWAY
“I am a rock,
I am an island.
I’ve built walls,
A fortress deep and mighty,
That none may penetrate.”
‘And yet... Was it truly my own regret or have I been merely following the lines which tradition and law drew for me to go along? But if I cannot obey the law, who shall obey? What do I really need?’
Some small string (or maybe was it a neuron or synapse, it was too difficult to differ between them right now) snapped within Kuchiki heir’s soul, making it even more hard for him to concentrate. He tried in vain to find the right way to respond...
“Alright, Renji. I shall do what you request.” Byakuya said simply, hardly believing his own words.
The drunken, arrogant grin on Renji’s face turned into a loving, warm, considerate smile, the auburn gaze softened noticeably.
“Oi, taichou, finally. Talk to me, touch me, look at me – please...” Abarai was almost begging on his knees, something very unusual, considering Renji’s competitive and courageous ego.
Byakuya, promising silently to himself that it would but be just a quick glance, looked at the redhead and momentarily lost all rational thoughts. Leaning towards Renji, he wrapped his arm around Abarai’s waist and pulled his subordinate up, kissing him hungrily and less and less deliberately. Taking the linen haori off Renji’s shoulders, he touched the tattooed, silky smooth skin, beneath which life had been pulsating so strongly, radiating it’s warmth and energy into Abarai’s reiatsu that currently surrounded Byakuya like a sunglow, making it possible for the wounds to heal, for memory to forget the pain and sadness of the soul to disappear. He took Renji’s palms in his, placing soft, delicate kisses on the inner side of them, and then on the wrists, in the place where the pulse could be traced. Byakuya felt somehow overjoyed, light-hearted and relieved, his instinct telling him to follow the path he had entered. Nipping at Renji’s shoulders and chest, Byakuya’s lips involuntarily went along tattoo lines, slowly reaching the muscular abdomen and hard, almost fully erected penis. Gently, almost reluctantly, he unfolded the silky, fragile glands from the foreskin, stroking the delicate, thin strip of the skin, provocatively licking it afterwards and watching the colour of the glands change... He felt Renji’s hand clench on his shoulder, the other running down his back, scratching, bruising the porcelain skin with sharp, hard nails.
It had been a momentarily made decision – there was no turning back, no place for hesitation, for doubt or shame... Byakuya knelt, bent his head, his back turned towards Renji, who gave a surprised, wordless cry.
“Is that what ye want, taichou...?” He whispered, voice hoarse, barley audible.
“Come, Renji...” Byakuya murmured. “Just... do it, Renji. Don’t ask questions... Come to me...”
Renji did as he was told, both overwhelmed and enthralled by his lover’s directness. First slowly, then faster, touching, changing rhythm and speed, teasing and caressing, the redhead sent his beloved over the edge, making him loose control utterly, his breath shallow, irregular... The whole world exploded... or so it seemed.
“A little death
Without mourning
No call
And no warning
Baby...a dangerous idea
That almost makes sense”
“I luv ye so much, taichou... You’re so beautiful, my black-haired angel of death!” Renji exclaimed, burying his hands in black strands, kissing the shapely, pale neck in a passionate caress. “I luv ye, always have...” And then he came, screaming Byakuya’s name, an extrovert, impatient, magenta coloured spark, emotional, willingly and wholeheartedly giving all that he had. Exposed, vulnerable his heart had been at this very moment...
“I’m gonna run, I’m gonna try
I’m gonna take this love
Right to ya
All my heart, all the joy
Oh baby, baby please”
Byakuya flew into this warmth and tenderness like a moth to the flame, feeling the sudden urge to melt, to literally become one with Renji and never go back to his so-valued solitude and independence... Abarai’s arms were wrapped around him, he felt safe, he felt loved and accepted. So peaceful, so warm, so familiar...
Waking up in the morning was like loosing a beautiful dream: the remorse and sense of guilt overflew Byakuya’s reason and hit him where it hurt, with all the power they’ve had. No amount of warmth radiating from sleeping Renji, not even the feeling of his arm wrapped protectively around Kuchiki’s waist could beguile them. No joy was left, just plain disgust. Towards his own self. For being so silly to do the things he had done the previous night. But he felt loved...
‘No, this is wrong. There is no safety within love, it only maketh one vulnerable and weak! No emotion has the value equal to the value of law, of order, of duty and responsibility. If there had been no law, the whole world would have collapsed, broken into pieces, peace and life destroyed forever.’
“Don’t talk of love,
But I’ve heard the words before;
It’s sleeping in my memory.
I won’t disturb the slumber of feelings that have died.
If I never loved I never would have cried.
I am a rock,
I am an island.”
And so Byakuya got up from the futon, put his robes on and left Renji still sleeping among the white sheets. 'It shall not happen again – I will keep my promise this time, I swear I will'.
Back to his old self again, he proceeded to follow the daily routine. The only disturbing fact is that he could not look Renji in the eyes and had to set his sight on something else instead. But he can get used to that. The alternative is unacceptable, unthinkable. Cold, unemotional, reasonable, responsible – that is what he is like. Responsible, dutiful, distant. A very appropriate description, indeed. Renji seemed startled at first, then he tried to brake his taichou’s stoic façade, stubbornly and strenuously knocking on the closed door. Byakuya was unwilling to respond. However, why did he still experience pain deep inside his heart?
In the evening of sixth day Byakuya decided to go and ask captain Unohana for help. She asked him to take a seat and examined him carefully.
“Nothing seems to be wrong with your vascular system, Kuchiki-taichou. Your heart is in perfect condition as well. Therefore, I assume that it most likely a problem of a psychological nature. Would you care to tell me what is troubling you, Kuchiki-san?” the sapphire-eyed woman asked calmly.
“I think there is no reason why I should not... Being torn between duty and your own feelings may be destructive, Unohana-taichou. I don’t know what to choose, what to do anymore...” Byakuya replied, looking at her with an enormous amount of sadness in his eyes.
“And what would you like to choose, Kuchiki-taichou? Is there anything you might need to make your choice easier?”
“To be honest, I would have been a relief to get rid of my nobility for a while, just to see how it is when one can make one’s own choices...” Byakuya said, even more confused than at the beginning of conversation.
“One is always capable of doing that, Kuchiki-taichou. If one has a strong heart, one can do anything one wants. You only have to let yourself think that way” Unohana replied, smiling faintly. “If you are in love with the person whose name I have in my mind currently, then trust that person, believe in what you have already built”
“Then, Unohana-san, do you think that we could be truly happy together?” Byakuya asked.
“Yes, I think you could” Unohana Retsu stated, embracing Zaraki Kenpachi, who had just entered the room and kissed her on the cheek.
***
Renji gave up hope. It was so naïve to think that anything would change: it was time for him to leave.
***
“Have you seen Renji, Rukia? I have been looking all over for him and haven’t found him yet... Not to mention there is no sign of his reiatsu as well...” Byakuya asked his sister, the anxiety rapidly rising within his soul.
“I’m afraid not, nii-sama...” Rukia sighed. “I suppose he has left us. He had made his decision, nii-sama. I don’t know why, but currently he’s purposefully suppressing his reiatsu, hiding his energy. He doesn’t want to be found, he doesn’t want any of us looking for him... Nii-sama, did anything happen recently? Have Renji told you that someone had wounded him or that he had done something inexcusable, unforgivable? Do you have any idea why he had left Zabimaru in Soul Society?”
Byakuya was speechless. He stood there, before his delicate-looking, little sister, a married, loving woman, the mother of his nephew - and just stared at her, feeling ashamed, small and stupid, and inexperienced. She seemed to know everything, and he... he was an old, ridiculous clown, pretending to be someone.
“So you build that wall (build that wall)
Yes, you build that wall (build that wall)
And you make it stronger”
(...)
“But for now, we’ll go on living separate lives
Yes for now, we’ll go on living separate lives
Separate lives”