Angry at the World

Grimmjow Jeagerjacques sat upon a desk within his room, feet resting on the seat of his chair. He grimaced unconsciously; it was practically his neutral expression. He was antsy. He was fidgety. His fingers tapped. And he was pissed, because the source of his anxiousness that punk Kurosaki. He had hoped one violent and passionate lay with the stupid boy would solve his obsession, but that wasn’t the case.

He remembered the smile he’d seen once. That smile burned him because it was honest. So did his anger in a fight, and the tears he’d shed. He was so honest. Honest. He had to consume it, he was so hungry. Truth didn’t exist in Hueco Mundo, or if it did, its home was in no fucking way Las Noches. He grabbed the chair and hurled it against a wall, smashing it to pieces before returning to his brooding.

No, it couldn’t just be the honesty he wanted to devour. He wore his hate on his sleeve all the same as the brat did. There had to be something else.

He already knew he wanted to devour his body. He’d already indulged in that and planned to do it again.
His grimace deepened, and he had a hunch that he knew what he might be feeling. But to all hell, if that didn’t make him hate Kurosaki even more.

He hopped down from the desk, growling in frustration. Not only did he have the sneaking suspicion that he wanted something—he shuddered- -more, but goddamn if Kurosaki hadn’t been one of the best fucks he’d ever had. He knew that made him even more disgusting than he usually considered himself, but really. He had to admit it. The redhead’s body fit to his perfectly, holding him tightly and responding to him like a nervous teenage virgin girl. He grinned to himself; he supposed Ichigo was as good as a nervous teenage virgin girl at the time. But he didn’t want some giggling and weak sack of flesh, he wanted that fiery bastard to stand against him every step of the way and make him work for it.

Whatever some stupid cunt might argue about consent, Ichigo had gone out of his way at least a few times to make the experience more pleasurable for him, and that was enough to indicate interest for Grimmjow. Good sex, no, great sex. Think about great sex, and be happy. That’s what he wanted to do, and ignore the wriggling feeling inside that he could help calm the turmoil inside the stupid Shinigami, and keep him from turning into another version of himself. What did he care if he turned ruthless and cruel and angry at the world? If he kept punching the wall long enough, well, he didn’t care at all.


~


He knelt on all fours, gazing down at Ichigo’s face. He was in a dilemma about what to do. He was horny and lonely, so it seemed obvious what he should do, but...Well, it just seemed rude to wake up an invalid for sex, especially only a day after his first time. His brows came together as he scowled and traced an ugly dark bruise forming across the Shinigami’s nose. What kind of allies didn’t heal their comrade? It didn’t really matter to him that he was responsible for the bruise in the first place.

He ground his teeth and leaned his weight back onto his legs, so that he was almost sitting on Ichigo’s chest. He looked tired. Dark circles around his eyes, reddened skin. Soft lips just barely open—No, no. No lips. He looked determinedly at his closed eyes instead. Annoying boy. He slipped off Ichigo’s prone body and inspected the room. He didn’t think this was his house, but whose was it? There was an echo of reiatsu behind him, and he grinned.

“Don’t try and control your reiatsu. I know you can’t,” he heard a curse being spat out behind him, and he turned to meet Ichigo’s venomous glare. “You can turn down the fireworks fairy, I ain’t here to hurt ya,” he said reprovingly. Ichigo gritted his teeth.

“I oughta kill you where you stand,” he said, his voice murderously low. Grimmjow laughed.

“The problem is, fairy, you ain’t strong enough to kill me before I beat the shit outta you, much less after. So why don’t we have a chat,” he said. He strutted over to his bed and sat down.

“I don’t want to fucking chat with you!” He threw the covers off himself and scanned the room for Zangetsu. Grimmjow narrowed his eyes.

“Play it smart for once, Kurosaki.” The redhead glared back at him, gripping the blankets tightly, before sighing and relaxing a little.

“Fine. I don’t get what the hell you want to talk about anyway.”

“Alright then,” he said with another grin. “How about you crying and holding onto me like your life depended on it?” Another spike in the Shinigami’s reiatsu. He was riling him up… Good.

“I…was confused,” his answer was through gritted teeth, and his hands were back to gripping the blankets.

“That’s the thing Kurosaki,” he said slowly. “I don’t think you were confused. I think deep in that fucked up head of yours, you knew what you were doing,” he tapped his own head for emphasis.

“My fucked up head?!”He yelled.

“You must not be rememberin’ what you screamed Kurosaki, cause it seems like you were beggin’ for an opportunity to break down,” he said with something of a leer. He was pushing the boundaries here, but he had to break something in there. Find a way in. Take what was his.

~


Ichigo felt the breath rush out from his lungs, and none came back in to replace it. What was this monster doing? Talking to him? Toying with him? How dare the bastard. He never did have words to combat the truth when he’d been trying to tell a lie. Now wasn’t any different. So much pain had been drained out of his body that night, more than he’d ever thought possible. But that couldn’t possibly mean what Grimmjow done had been good. He would never tell him that.

“I could help you with all of it,” Grimmjow said, some of manic glint disappearing from his eyes, replaced with seriousness. He sucked in a breath.

“Why don’t you come back when I’m healed and we’ll see how I can help you out,” he replied.

“Ooh, feisty. Little boy wants to fight like a grown man. But think about me Kurosaki…” he pushed him onto his back and leaned over him, breathing hotly onto his face. A little ball of terror uncurled in his chest, remembering the last time he’d been put in this position. “Think about what I can do for you. I can put you in that heaven every night.” It wasn’t Heaven, he hadn’t wanted to enjoy it. Teal eyes bore straight into him. He had to become strong enough to stop this. Grimmjow leaned closer to his ear, speaking even more quietly. “I can do something for you that no one else can, Kurosaki… because nobody hates everybody else as much as you and I do.” He bit harshly down onto Ichigo’s ear and then was gone.

He sat up with a rush, refusing to give in to the urge to breathe heavily. He wasn’t that weak, or that afraid. He scowled heavily and wiped the blood from his ear. He ran it between his fingers, thinking, before getting out of the bed and grabbing Zangetsu.

“RENJI!” He yelled. “RENJI, GET YOUR ASS IN HERE!” The door burst open and Renji looked all over the room, looking for the cause of the fuss.

“What the hell!? What’s wrong!?” He grabbed Renji’s hakama and pulled him closer.

“Get your ass to the basement, we’re sparring.” He shoved him away and started walking to the basement.

“…What?! You’re crazy, you not remem—“ Ichigo whipped around and gave him a look that he normally reserved for his enemies. Level eyes with no hint of humor. It was serious enough to startle Renji into shutting up.

“We’re sparring, and I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about,” He slung Zangetsu over his shoulder, and resumed his walk. Behind him, Renji looked at him with mute resignation.


~

It was his luck, to deal with a vengeful Ichigo first thing in the morning. He’d probably never be forgiven for seeing that moment of weakness last night, but he would never regret giving the stupid strawberry the help he’d needed.

He looked skeptically across the distance between them, wondering what good he could possibly be in a fight right now. He didn’t really want to hurt Ichigo so soon, and he had a dark feeling that he’d end up winning this sparring match. That wouldn’t do anyone any good at all.

“You gonna stare at me all day Renji?!” Ichigo grinned cockily and disappeared in a flash, suddenly clashing Zangetsu against an unreleased Zabimaru.

“Hey, moron, give a guy a little warning!” He replied with a snarl. He shoved against Ichigo’s blade and jumped back, running his hand along Zabimaru’s length to release him. Within an instant he’d whipped the flexible blade at his opponent’s head. Ichigo slashed against the blade to repel it, and began a quick run towards Renji.

The darker redhead smirked and whipped back the blade towards Ichigo’s back, a counterattack he spun to block, and then smashed away to leave Renji wide open. He let out a yell of triumph as he jumped into the air, dove down and slammed his sword into the ground where Renji had stood a moment before. Dust bloomed into a cloud, and he leapt backwards as Zabimaru cut across the mark Zangetsu had just left in the ground.

“Ne baka, we all know how to jump!” Renji yelled as he whipped his sword for another attack. Ichigo disappeared again; flash stepping in a zig zag to avoid the whip-like sword and thrusting forward during the hole between Renji’s attacks. He felt a hint of annoyance that the substitute Shinigami was still this good, even when wounded and traumatized. He might lose after all. He swerved his torso to the side to avoid the thrust, and slashed across Ichigo’s chest with an unexpanded Zabimaru. Ichigo bent backwards and did a back hand spring to his feet. Sweat was starting to bead on both of their foreheads, but Renji wasn’t enjoying himself…Not nearly enough to match stupid Ichigo’s grin, anyway. He was closer to a grimace, personally.

“You’re getting on my nerves Renji!” He cried with a bark of a laugh.

“Hell, there ain’t any time when you’re not on my nerves you son of a bitch!” He yelled back through gritted teeth, and whipped his sword at him once more. Ichigo slashed up to block the attack, and flash stepped towards Renji once more. The difference was that Renji was expecting him this time. Zangetsu bit deep into the flesh of his shoulder, and Zabimaru ate hungrily into Ichigo’s side. Blood splashed from Renji’s shoulder and the wound in Ichigo’s side as he pulled away slowly. Maybe if he’d been more into the fight, Renji would have used the opportunity to counterattack, but Ichi was already looking finished. His brows snapped together in a scowl, and after a moment’s hesitation, he sheathed Zabimaru. “You never know when to quit.”

“You’re just as bad off, jackass…” Ichigo grinned as he fell back onto his ass.

“I still win, bitch,” he followed suit and put his hand over his shoulder.

“Only cause I’m tired.”

“Doesn’t mean I won’t tell everyone.”

“I’m not even that bad off,” he snapped.

“You just can’t lose gracefully,” he retorted.

“If I weren’t hurt, I’d show you graceful…” He trailed off and grumbled something unintelligible.

“Shut up and wait for Urahara to find us,” Renji said sharply, before lying on his back. “Cause I ain’t carrying your ass up.”

“Lazy asshole…”he said before copying him and laying back, hand clutching his side. “You’re just fine…”

“Doesn’t mean I want to haul you up a ladder… Maybe this’ll build a little character,” he replied with a smirk.”
“I’ll show you fucking character,” he growled and flipped him off. Renji just laughed and flipped him the bird right back.


~AN~

Hello! I'm really just tickled pink by the reviews...Really, I blushed. I don't think I've ever received so much praise. I'm glad you all have been enjoying my writing. I'm not going to be one of those authors who's all "I'll update after __ reviews!!!!!!" But know that all of your reviews are appreciated and are also pretty motivating. Again, I'm sorry for lack of smuttiness(this is an adult story afterall) but this story has kind of taken on a real plot, and in order to have real development, I'm sacrificing delicious yaoi occuring every chapter. I also like to have chapters be kind of long, which is why I'm not updating as often as perhaps I could. College is busy too, folks.

In response to a few specifics... I'm trying to go over and fix typos, I know there are a few here and there that I have missed.

I know Ichigo is hard to break and unlikely to be happy about it, which I tried to show in this chapter and will definitely try to show throughout the story.

The story is not going to be mpreg. I'm not a fan of mpreg, and it would also be crazy out of place. The story is kind of serious and I can't help but giggle a little if mpreg is involved, really. As far as Ichigo and Grimmjow falling in love...Well, we'll see. I can't just go spoiling things for everyone.

I think that covers about everything. Thanks for reading!