A Shinigami Valentine

How she had gotten roped into helping Nanao and Nemu with the Valentine's Day matchmaking scheme was beyond her. She had a sneaking sensation that Captain Kurotsuchi might have engineered the chance coincidence. It had seemed odd that Nemu happened to be passing by the Division 7 offices at the same time Akina went to lunch. Especially since she took her lunch at the same time everyday. Regardless, she'd been shanghaied into helping the two of them with the actual matches.

Oh well, it didn't really matter now because she was trapped, she thought as she followed Lt. Ise into the Division 12 research department. She was walking into the heart of Captain Kurotsuchi's lair and it made her incredibly nervous.

"Do we have to do this here? I hate this place. It really creeps me out." she hissed to Nanao as they walked. Nanao didn't even look back at her as she coldly commented,

"Captain Kurotsuchi has been kind enough to share this technology with us, you should try to remain respectful."

"Yes, ma'am." Akina said quietly. Nemu appeared out of a side door.

"Lt. Ise and Ito-san, thank you for coming. The computers are through here. Captain Kurotsuchi is overseeing the final calculations as we speak." she said in her low, quiet voice. Akina always felt bad for the girl. She didn't have much of a life.

Nemu led them into a large room filled with tall computers. In front of one, stood Captain Kurotsuchi. He was pressing buttons while consulting with a small monitor at the same time.

"Lt. Ise and Ito-san have arrived, sir." Nemu said in an even lower voice. Kurotsuchi spun around. His eyes flew immediately to Akina.

"Ah! Excellent. You have the key cards, Nemu?" he said sharply to his daughter. She stepped forward, offering him a stack of cards.

"What are those?" Akina asked before she thought it through. She immediately regretted her curiosity because it focused his attention entirely on her.

"These, my dear Akina, are key cards onto which all the information from your questionnaires has been entered. They are an archaic way of doing it but Lt. Ise has insisted on completely anonymity."

As he spoke, he inched closer to Akina. His mere physical presence turned her stomach. He smiled down at her with his gold eyes glittering within the skeletal mask he wore.

"That's fascinating." she lied, back up slightly.

"Please, Captain Kurotsuchi, explain to me what I need to do." Lt Ise asked, capturing his attention.

"You will do nothing but gather the information, my dear woman. I'll not have you touching my equipment."

"Perhaps I could input the cards?" Nemu asked quietly. Kurotsuchi turned on her as if to strike her.

"I think that's an excellent idea." Akina said quickly. He faltered, glancing back at her.

"It was my intention to remain and assist you ladies. But if you insist...I will be available if needed." he said coldly, shoving the cards at Nemu before striding quickly away. Akina breathed a sigh of relief.

"The matches will be printed out here." Nemu explained. "Each has been assigned a randomly selected number so that no tampering can occur. Here," she said to Lt. Ise as she handed her a clipboard with a several pieces of paper attached.

"...is the master list."

"This has all the names and the numbers assigned to them?" Lt. Ise asked, flipping the papers as she glanced over the list. She tucked it under her arm as she listened to Nemu explain the process of computing the matches. Akina glanced at the first page discreetly. She caught sight of her name. She was number 16. She looked away, leaning forward in mock interest then glanced back quickly. She noticed the captain's had been assigned numbers that correlated to their divisions. Predictable, she thought with a smile.

"So what do I do?" she asked.

"I want you to read off the matches...the numbers. Then I'll make note of it on the master list. After which, I'll send notices to those involved. They'll receive the questionnaires of the person they were matched with."

"Why are we sending out the questionnaires?" Akina asked curiously.

"Several of the men have asked to see the answers provided by their matches. I honestly think they're interested in the vital statistics." she sighed wearily which led Akina to think the person asking was her captain, Captain Shunsui Kyoraku, a notorious skirt chaser.

"I see...so all you want me to do is read out the matches to you?" Akina asked as Nemu began feeding the cards into the computer. Lt. Ise nodded, preparing to write. They waited until Nemu had completed the cards. The machine seemed to be busily processing the information then at the far end of the computer, where Akina stood, paper began to print out.

"Wait until it's finished printing, then you can tear it off." Nemu explained from the other end of the enormous piece of machinery. Akina nodded.

The print-out on the paper showed pairs of numbers. Akina paid it little attention until she saw the pair of # 16 and # 12 fly by. Her eyes widened in horror. She'd been matched up with Captain Kurotsuchi. Oh no, her mind screamed. She could stand a lot but not a date with that man. Even if she could tolerate the close quarters, he'd probably have her dissected into tiny pieces before dessert arrived. She closed her eyes a moment. She really hadn't thought much about the silly date other than to hope she might be paired up with Captain Zaraki. It never crossed her mind that she might end up with Mayuri Kurotsuchi.

The print-out stopped. Akina was still lost in thought.

"Ito-san, you may remove the paper now." Nemu called out, breaking through her tortured reverie.

"Oh...okay..." Akina said softly. Her eyes kept returning to her number. It was near the bottom of the page with only one pairing below it. That pair was # 19 and #11. Eleven...she stared at the number. That was Zaraki.

"Please begin!" Lt. Ise called out. Akina's gaze shifted to the top of the list. She called out the pairs of numbers numbly. The closer she grew to the bottom of the page, the more her heart raced. Finally she reached #16. Without missing a beat, the words flew out of her mouth without passing through her mind first,

"Number sixteen and number eleven."

"Is that the last one?" Lt Ise asked.

"No, there's one more pair." Akina continued, trying to keep her voice even. She was doing a terrible disservice to whoever #19 was. She hoped nothing bad happened to the woman as she said,

"Number nineteen and number twelve. That's it."

"Excellent. Akina, would you help me prepare the questionnaires? We're going to use the royal messengers to deliver them." Ise said with a faint smile.

"Sure." she said, balling up the print-out but keeping it safely clutched in her hand. As she started from the room, Nemu touched her arm as she said,

"I'll discard that for you, Ito-san."

"That's okay. I got it." she said with a quick smile as she hurried from the building. She could feel Nemu's eyes watching her every step of the way.

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