A Happy Crystal Heart

It was a pretty afternoon. The sun was shining warmly on the lawn. I knew that something was going to screw it up, and I knew exactly what that something was. Or at least, I thought I did. I had walked into the chamber where they were holding the lieutenant meeting, because I had been ordered to by my Captain, and quickly found myself running errands. I was taking invitations to all of the captains, for some strange event that the Sotaicho was planning. This was supposed to be Hanataro’s job, but for some reason they had me doing it. It wasn’t so bad, since most of the captain’s were nice. Except the strange captain’s that were in charge of the 11th and 12th squads. I couldn’t quite understand them. And they live right beside each other, so there are constant fights. I’m kind of glad that I got out of the 10th, since that was just way to close to it.

“Well, it could be worse.” I mumbled to myself as I walked into Captain Ukitake’s home. The scene that greeted my eyes was, to say the least, quite a shock. Ukitake was sitting on a chair, half dressed and having a strange conversation with Hanataro. So this is where that little brat went…. I thought to myself as I placed a hand over my eyes and knocked on the side of the doorframe, since the door seemed to be missing.

“Tasha-san? Hold on just a second.” I simply nodded in the direction of his voice, not wanting to look up. There was a quiet shuffling, and a hand on my shoulder. I peeked between my fingers to see it was Ukitake, still half dressed, grinning down at me. “Did you need something? You aren’t frustrated already, are you?” I slid my hand halfway down my face, covering my nose and mouth.

“Um, no, I’m not…frustrated…whatever you mean by that….and I came to give you this, since Hanataro is skipping on his duties.” Ukitake looked at the folded piece of paper curiously before he took it and leaned on the frame next to me to read it. God, he could have taken a few seconds to pull some cloths on at least! I thought as I shifted to the other side of the doorway. What kind of therapy is he doing anyway? I was somewhat curious at this point, but was afraid to ask.

“He’s a sex therapist, you know.” I turned my head to look at Kira, as he walked up to me. “And he’s a very good one too. He has very interesting methods.” Well that would explain the lack of clothing. That and it puts one too many ideas in my head…

“Izuru? Did something happen with Ikaku? Do you need my services?” My eyes went wide at this comment, and I could feel my face start to heat.

“No, everything is fine. I just came to tell Hanataro that a certain someone needs to speak to him later.” Ukitake gave Kira a smile, and I noticed the slight hint of a blush cross his face. Weird…I swear. I thought to myself as Ukitake handed the letter back to me.

“Well, if you ever need something, come and speak to me about it, alright?” Kira nodded, casting me a look as Ukitake placed a hand upon my head. “You too Tasha-san. Don’t ever be afraid to come to me for advice.” I gave him a halfhearted nod, sure that I wouldn’t need….sex therapy, and walked out of the room. As I headed towards my Captain’s home to deliver the last letter, I ran dead smack into Tabi. She paused for a moment, looking stunned, before she spoke.

“Hiya Tasha-chan! Have you seen Shiro-chan?” I nodded.

“Last time I saw him I was delivering a letter. He was in his room, I think.” Tabi cocked her head.

“His room? Seriously? I never would have thought to look there…..Thanks!” I stared at Tabi blankly as she rushed off. Why would she not think to look in his room? Do they spend that much time in her room? Ridiculous, I swear… I gave a small sigh. At least their relationship seemed to be going well. I continued on my way to Captain Kuchiki’s, and paused in front of his door. I don’t want to just walk in, I could get killed that way… or worse! I quietly knocked on the door, and nearly jumped as it was slammed open, an irritated looking Byakuya peering down at me.

“What?” He said calmly. It was strange how he could say something in such a calm, authoritative voice, while looking so pissed off. I shivered inwardly as I handed him the letter.

“It’s from the Sotaicho. I was told to deliver it to all of the Captains.” Captain Kuchiki looked down at the letter in my hand, before he turned and closed the door, not even bothering to take the letter. I blinked, feeling rather insulted. I clenched my teeth for a moment as I gathered my courage together, and barged into his room.

“Hey! What’s the big…I…dea….” My voice slowly caught in my throat as I looked at the scene before me. All of his clothes…. Were a bright purple. This included his Captain’s robes. “Oh…I see….that’s why Tabi was walking away from here….She got you … again …” My captain cast me an angry glare, his hand clenched tightly.

“I’m going to kill her. I swear on all of the stars in the universe, she’s dead.” I walked over and gave him a sympathetic pat on the head. Faster then my reflexes allowed, I was pulled down to the floor, and was now peering up into a pair of unfamiliar eyes. Not unfamiliar in the sense that I didn’t know them, but the expression that I had never seen before. I pulled a little, trying to ease myself out from under him, but couldn’t.

“Um… Captain…? I’m not sure if you realize this or not….but you have me pinned to the floor, and I can’t move…” There was a soft breath in my ear and I shivered.

“Yes, I know. Just lay still for a moment.” My body froze, and I looked up at the locks of hair that fell down and brushed my face. Several minutes had passed, and he still hadn’t moved from his spot. I could feel my heart beat start to quicken and panic starting to build.

“C-captain…..? Are you alright?” I heard him sigh softly and he shifted his weight so that he sat back on his heels.

“Of course I’m alright.” He said calmly, holding out his hand. I noticed that the look in his eyes had disappeared, and the normal cold stare was back. I felt slightly disappointed, but relieved at the same time as I handed him the letter. He sat back on his cushion, reading the letter as he did so. He raised a brow after a moment, and sighed. “Joy. Don’t I just love these kind of events.” He muttered, tossing the letter to the floor. I gave him an annoyed look as I picked the paper up.

“You don’t sound too happy about it captain….” Byakuya cocked his head at me for a moment, before a small smile crossed his lips.

“I know exactly what will make this mess bearable. You’re coming with me, no ‘if’’s, ‘an’s or ‘but’s. Got it?” I gave my captain a confused look.

“But I….” He cast me a glower so fierce that my tongue tied itself into a knot in my mouth before I could even finish my sentence.

“You will go to the event with me whether you like it or not.” I nodded obediently, then proceeded to help him attempt to fix his clothing. After that I decided not to question him anymore, no matter how little sense it made. I guess I will end up in this odd little party…. I’m kind of scared to find out what will happen…

Author’s note:

Tasha: That was an interesting chapter! A party, a party! That’s what I want to throw! Will you join us in the party next time? You will? Great! See ya next chapter!

Tabi: All right everyone, I didn’t seem as insane in this chapter, that’s pretty nice. The sex therapist Ukitake can be explained. I wrote this story called Ukitake-Sex Therapist and Tash just couldn’t get it out of her head so she had to allude to it here. If anyone wants to look it up, my name on here is Anestshia.