Sinner

A/N: Oh yes, thank you so much for all the reviews. They are simply wonderful. I am glad that you all are enjoying this story and I hope to not disappoint. Just a note…yes, I am trying to make Gin and Toshiro’s relationship as complicated as hell, but you’ve got to admit, it’s more fun that way.

Anyways, onto the reviewers.

esther: Yes, I want to show that Gin isn’t just a one-dimensional character and that he in fact has many sides. I am glad that you are liking this and I hope you continue to read.

Eyes0nme19: Thank you so much for the review, and I absolutely love writing both of their characters.

Catarotta: Oh God, I hate those stories too. The type that has absolutely no plot development. I think they are boring and that they often times ruin the character. Also, thank you for being such a devoted reviewer. You rock.

Rubedo Jr.: You flippin amaze me every time I read one of your reviews. It’s like reading a story in itself, they are always so beautiful and then I get to the end and I’m like “No, there’s no more!” And then I want to write just so you can write me more poetic reviews. Oh yes, and Gin has many faces and I plan to show them all, but Hitsugaya is not just going to become his bitch either.

Sean: Oh no, wouldn’t want you to have withdraws. Here I’ve produced another chapter to sate you, I hope it helps. Thank you so much for taking the time to tell me that you like my story.

young_saiyan: God, your review made me blush. There’s nothing quite like someone giving you a compliment like that. I very much appreciate it and I hope I continue to live up to your expectations. And YUS! Another Hinamori hater!…God, what a bitch.

Dracoqueen22: Thank you so much, I work hard to keep them in character, so it rocks that you think they are. And yes, I also love the evil ones…in fact, they are usually among my favorite characters in any anime. They just always seem to have more depth than the good guys, and who doesn’t love a badass?

yaoihentaiqueen: Glad I got you interested, I will work to keep you that way. You’re mine now! Muwhahaha!

Monica-sama: *Blush* thank you so much…I’m just happy that you guys like it. I don’t only write for myself, unlike a lot of authors and I really try to keep my readers interested/

p-sama7: Thank you, thank you, thank you! I am happy that you love and I will try to continue to appease you. And yes, I want to keep it as vivid and believable as possible.

Kristin: Thank you for telling me that I have talent. It is always good to hear that as an author and also thank you for telling me the plot is original. I must admit that it gets rather boring to continue to read the same things over and over again with different titles. Thank you for reviewing.

Ah done! Sorry if there are typos in the review responses, I didn’t get a chance to edit them. Ja!

TillThatTime

Child

He looked down at the simple robes that they had given him to wear. His teal eyes scanned over the material as he took in the shock white that almost matched perfectly to his hair. They had given him no clean underwear to go along with the plain garment, and he wasn’t sure if it had simply been forgotten or if this was just another one of Aizen’s ploys for his own sadistic amusement. Something told Hitsugaya that it was the latter.

Easy access.

Hitsugaya couldn’t suppress a shiver at the thought.

Though he was loathed to admit that he was virtually helpless, that didn’t make him any less stubborn, and he’d be damned if that bastard got the better of him in that respect. No, he left his underwear on, despite them not being clean and he would leave them on as long as it took.

He sighed from his position on the firm mattress, his eyes leaving their scrutiny of his attire to look around the room, taking in its near emptiness, before his gaze settled on the door. There was no visible handle, and from where he sat it just looked like another plane of the white walls. Impossible to open from the inside, and probably code entry from the outside, he had been too out of it when Ichimaru had brought him in to take notice, but now he wished that he had paid a little more attention. Perhaps then he might have been able to figure out a way to get out of this place.

Even he had to suppress a snort at that thought.

He was in a sealed tight, reiatsu constricting room. Hyorinmaru was nowhere in sight, and he was weak from the wounds inflicted by the quinto espada. He had been defeated, completely and utterly defeated, and the only thing he had left to hang onto was his pride, and even that seemed to be dwindling.

He fell back slowly onto the mattress that he was currently occupying. His eyes squeezed tightly shut and he gritted his teeth as his muscles contracted painfully and he fought to relax them. Ichimaru had cleaned and treated his wounds, but that didn’t mean that they were anywhere near being healed.

Ichimaru…

Hitsugaya emitted a low growl through his clenched teeth as the image of that man appear before his shut eyes. That manipulative bastard had done it again. Had made him feel small and helpless in the eyes of some vicious monster. Had made him beg and plead to not be undressed, to not be humiliated, to not be completely and thoroughly fucked. He had won again.

He always did…

Hitsugaya clenched the sheets under his fists as his memory reminded him of only moments ago when he had stood trembling and frightened like some blubbering…child. He could still feel Ichimaru’s fingers as they had hooked into his underwear, could still feel the man’s fingernails as they had scraped along the battered skin of his hips, could still feel his skin, scorching against his own cold flesh.

Ichimaru had wanted to jar him, to frighten him, to pick up where they had left off and play their little game that always left Hitsugaya feeling less than he was by the end. And Hitsugaya had played beautifully and pathetically into those hands. He had whimpered and cringed and…

Dammit!

But what else was he supposed to have done!? Allowed Ichimaru to rip away his clothes until he stood nude in front of the fox, standing upright and determined as if he still had his dignity left? Ichimaru had acted just as Hitsugaya should have suspected him to act. He had manipulated him cruelly and decisively as if Hitsugaya was a simple pawn in an elaborate game of shogi. And yet, when it came down to the end, when there had only been one thing left between them, he had…

…stopped.

And perhaps that is what angered Hitsugaya the most, the fact that no matter how hard he tried, he could never completely figure the bastard out. The tenth division taicho hated not knowing things, hated not understanding them, and Ichimaru was something that continued to confuse him, and no matter how much he insisted inside his own mind that Ichimaru was the enemy and that he shouldn’t care that he couldn’t figure him out, it bothered him nonetheless, and that was the one thing that he didn’t dare try to understand why.

So Ichimaru had stopped when he could have gone all the way and stripped every last inch of pride that Hitsugaya fought viciously to hang onto, and instead of getting to hate the man like he longed to, instead of feeling that same burning desire to kill him as he did when it came to Aizen, he was left feeling relieved, almost grateful, and far more used than any harsh deflowering fuck could ever bring him to feel. And it sickened Hitsugaya to think that of all the things that Ichimaru had done, all the harm he had done to the home that he fought so hard for, that was the only thing that could really bring him to hate Ichimaru Gin, and even then it was a mutated and mocking version of an emotion that should be so clear.

Troubled by his thoughts, and a new throbbing in his head to accompany the rest of his aching body, he turned over abruptly onto his side, ignoring the pain that the action brought him. He stifled a groan as he pulled the crisp sheets over his head burying his face into the hard mattress, and cringing as the slightly rough material rubbed against the soft skin of his cheek. He wondered vaguely if doing this would help to block out his unwanted thoughts and if it was childish to hope so. It wasn’t long before exhaustion made itself apparent and his features relaxed and his breathing deepened as he began to drift towards sleep, and not for the first time, Ichimaru Gin was the last thing he thought of before he surrendered himself completely.

The first thing he felt when he began to awaken from his slumber was warm fingers against the skin of his forehead. They ran almost teasingly through his hair before coming to cup his cheek, tilting his head slightly until he felt hot breath against the shell of his ear. He shivered slightly at the not-so-unpleasant sensation, and through his hazed mind he had to admit that the gentle hand felt quite nice, and he didn’t stop himself as he nuzzled absentmindedly into the palm.

“Wakey wakey, Taicho-brat.” A familiar voice crooned tauntingly into his ear and his eyes shot open automatically. Ichimaru’s face was mere inches away from his own, and Hitsugaya felt the all too familiar sensation of a blush painting his cheeks. He quickly tried to squirm away from the former captain, but the task proved more painful than he had thought and he ended up landing heavily back on the mattress with a groan. “Careful there, ’ittle one. Hate fer ya ta open up yer cuts.” Ichimaru said in that same sickeningly cheerful voice, his unwavering grin cracking his cheeks as usual.

“What the hell are you doing, Ichimaru?” Hitsugaya growled, attempting to swat away Ichimaru’s hands which had continued their task of tracing along his face.

Ichimaru cocked his head to the side in mock thought, before reaching op and flicking Hitsugaya’s nose and Hitsugaya had never wanted to bite someone’s fingers off quite as much as he did at that moment, but viewing it as a very undignified thing to do, he held back from the urge and instead opted to glare death at the man’s audacity.

“Jus’ checkin’ the wound on yer head there. I wouldn’ want my pet dyin’ on me, now would I?” Letting out a huff of rage, all tiredness completely gone, Hitsugaya raised his fist to punch the silver haired man, but his wrist was caught by slender fingers before he could even get close, and Hitsugaya found his arm soon pinned above his head and the long form of Ichimaru hovering over his body. “Now now, Shiro-chan, tha’s not a very smart thin’ ta do.”

“I am not your fucking pet, Ichimaru.” Hitsugaya spat out venomously, choosing to ignore the fact that Ichimaru was practically on top of him.

Ichimaru let out an amused chuckle at that. “Oh, ya really think not? Lemme make somethin’ clear ta ya,” Ichimaru leaned down until his breath was once more ghosting over the shell of Hitsugaya’s ear and against his will the small taicho let out a gasp. “Only a pretty ’ittle bitch whimpers tha way that ya do.”

Hitsugaya raised his free hand, pushing it roughly against Ichimaru’s chest in an attempt to get the other man off of him, but Ichimaru merely grabbed onto that one as well, pinning it above Hitsugaya’s head along with the other one. “Plus, ya make sucha good pet, the way ya nuzzled my hand jus’ moments ago, like a kitty.” Hitsugaya found his face growing hot once more at Ichimaru’s words and the near purr in his voice. Ichimaru peered at him through unseen eyes as he took in the small taicho’s red face, his grin widening. “Somethin’ wrong, Neko-chan?

“Get the hell off of me, Ichimaru!” With renewed anger, Hitsugaya began to try to buck the fox like man off of him, not caring that he wasn’t necessarily being dignified and only eager to get as far away from Ichimaru as possible. In his attempt to dislodge himself from the grinning man, he felt a searing pain in his side, and immediately stopped his violent struggle, letting out a small cry of anguish and reaching down to grip at his stomach. He let his green eyes travel down his torso until he saw the blood that was now seeping through his hand and spreading to stain his clean, white clothes. His eyes stayed wide in shock as he stared for a moment before turning his focus on Ichimaru. What he saw on the man’s face was not what he expected. Ichimaru was not looking at him, but instead at the blood that was flowing between Hitsugaya’s fingers. The grin was completely gone from his face as he continued to stare down at Hitsugaya’s opened wound, and almost hesitantly he reached down to place his hand over Hitsugaya’s own, pushing the white haired boy’s palm harder against the wound. Hitsugaya stared at their combined hands in shock and he jumped when he heard Ichimaru’s voice.

“Keep applyin’ pressure.” Ichimaru said softly before removing his hand and standing up from his position on the bed. Hitsugaya looked up at Ichimaru’s face and noticed that as quickly as the smirk had gone, it was now back in place. “Naughty Neko, ya shoulda known better than ta struggle like that. Next time, I might jus’ punish ya.”

With that said he hoisted the small boy up into his arms, earning a startled and pained groan from Hitsugaya, followed by an enraged glare at the indignity of having someone as traitorous as Ichimaru actually carrying him. Ichimaru merely shrugged when he noted the scandalized look Hitsugaya was giving him. “Ya remember wha’ tha alternative is, right?”

Hitsugaya turned his head away then so he at least wouldn’t have to look at the man as he was carried out of the room. “Where are we going?” He inquired as Ichimaru made his way down the long hallway, he tried to ignore the way his stomach was beginning to turn, or the sticky sensation of blood covering his skin.

“I’m gonna feed ya ta tha Menos.” Ichimaru answered simply and Hitsugaya turned his gaze sharply towards the other man, shock written clearly on his features. Ichimaru giggled merrily at the younger taicho’s expression before continuing on down the hall.

Luckily, they didn’t run into any arrancar on the way, and Hitsugaya was grateful, because he didn’t want anyone to see him being lugged around, even if they were the enemy. It wasn’t long before they entered into a room, this one being much larger than his own. It was crisp and clean, rather nice in all actuality, but at the same time, it was just as plain as everything else seemed to be Hueco Mundo. The bed in the center indicated that this was someone’s sleeping quarters, and it really didn’t take a genius to figure out whose.

“Why did you bring me here?” Hitsugaya asked suspiciously, momentarily forgetting the pain in his side, and instead opting to feel uncomfortable for an entirely different reason.

“I thought it would be mo’ private.” Ichimaru said with an unmistakable leer, and Hitsugaya couldn’t help but shiver at the implication of those words.

“Look, you bastard, whatever you think you’re going-”

“Do shut up now, Snowy-chan.” Without really thinking about, Hitsugaya’s mouth snapped shut at Ichimaru’s words and instead he continued to glower at the man. That was until Ichimaru opened another door and they stepped into what appeared to be a very shiny bathroom. Hitsugaya was then deposited almost carefully onto the floor, his hand still clutching at his side. “Lemme see.” Ichimaru ordered, and he didn’t really even wait for Hitsugaya to remove his hand before pulling it away himself. “Tsk tsk, look wha’ ya did.” Ichimaru scolded, feigning disappointment. “Ya got yer new clothes all bloody. Wha’ would Aizen-sama say?”

“I don’t give a damn what Aizen-sama says.” Hitsugaya sneered, attempting to take a step back from Ichimaru, only to find himself held in place.

“S’ impolite. Ya really need ta work on that.” Ichimaru told him, though he gave no real implication that Hitsugaya’s ‘rudeness’ bothered him at all. Ichimaru turned away from him then and headed towards the bath at the end of the chamber. It was a personal one, much like the one he had had in his own private quarters in Seireitei. Ichimaru turned on the faucet and Hitsugaya watched in a sort of daze as water began to fill the tub, he also noted that Ichimaru threw in a substance that made bubbles spread over the surface. He continued staring until Ichimaru’s voice brought him back to attention.

“Git undressed, and git in the tub. I’ll be back in minute ta help ya wash. Ya stink, Taicho-brat. And hurry up, ‘o I may jus’ have ta throw ya in myself.” With that he stepped out of the bathroom, closing the door behind him, but not before throwing out “I thought a kiddy like ya would like tha bubbles.” he left Hitsugaya staring after him. It only took a moment for Ichimaru’s words to register in his shocked mind before he began to peel away his clothes as fast he could, not knowing when Ichimaru would decide to waltz back in. By the time he got the now soiled clothes off, and had hesitantly stepped out of his underwear, he noticed that the wound was not bleeding near as much as he had first thought. He walked unsteadily over to the edge of the bath and with a grunt he swung his legs inside, letting them sink under the water, before maneuvering his body over the edge as well. He slowly began to lower himself when he noted that the water was almost scalding hot.

“Itai.” He hissed as he continued to sink further into the water.

“Hot?” He turned sharply at the sudden sound of Ichimaru’s voice, and accidentally ended up slipping the rest of the way in, a startled gasp emitting from his lips at the heat of the water and Ichimaru’s sudden appearance.

“Bastard.” Hitsugaya seethed once he had adjusted somewhat to the water.

Ichimaru’s smile only widened at the harsh retort. “Child.” He shot back, knowing that to the icy taicho, that was the cruelest insult there was.

Hitsugaya’s eyes widened momentarily and then quickly narrowed at the word. “I am not a child!”

Ichimaru threw his head back, his silver bangs falling away from his eyes as he laughed loudly. He stepped towards Hitsugaya, kneeling behind the boy’s back, his fingers coming to trail lightly along his neck, causing Hitsugaya to flinch away before he closed his fingers around his neck completely, warning him silently not to move. “Ya know, kid, an adult wouldn’ feel tha need ta defend themselves s’ much.” Hitsugaya shivered despite the heat as he felt Ichimaru’s breath ghost along the back of his neck. When he felt the hand loosen he jerked away immediately.

“Don’t touch me, dammit! And don’t you dare speak to me as if you know anything about me.” Hitsugaya hissed, his voice barely above a whisper and betraying that fact that he wanted to pretend like those words didn’t effect him at all.

“Oh no, but I know ya better than anybody else, ’ittle one.” Ichimaru said softly, before producing a cloth from seemingly out of nowhere, soaking it in the water and then trailing it lightly over the skin of Hitsugaya’s exposed shoulder, and smirking when the boy’s body went rigged but for some reason didn’t pull away. “It really bothers ya, don’t it? Ta have worked s’ hard and then ta not be seen as anything mo’ than a mere baby.” Ichimaru whispered, his voice dangerously close to Hitsugaya’s ear, and between the gentle strokes of the cloth and the heat of Ichimaru’s words, Hitsugaya’s eyes fluttered closed, but he still hung onto every word that was being said to him. “Ya want their respect, their admiration. Ya want them ta bend over an’ kiss yer pretty ‘ittle toes, until they realize yer worth and see ya fer the man ya think ya are.” Ichimaru’s lips were so close to the skin of his neck that he could feel them move against him as he spoke, and he didn’t even notice as he slightly tilted his head to the side. “But ya will always be, ’ittle Shiro-chan ta them and ya know it. But here’s tha real kicker, if ya can’t even convince them that yer no kid, how will ya ever convince yerself?”

Hitsugaya’s eyes flew open at those words and he once more jerked himself away from Ichimaru’s touch. He knew the man was right, and Gods he hated him for it. He knew that their denial of his maturity made him sometimes disbelieve it himself. He knew that there were times when he caught lesser shinigami looking at him like a piece of meat and he wondered why they would look at a child that way. Those thoughts were always fleeting, he always caught them before the progressed, but they were still there.


He clenched his fists as his sides as he spoke in a low voice. “And you, Ichimaru? What do you see me as?” Ichimaru didn’t even seem to have to think of his answer and even though Hitsugaya wasn‘t looking at his face, he knew that smile was ever present, ever cruel, ever knowing.

“Why that’s easy, Neko. I see ya as innocence. Pure an’ pretty. Jus’ something else ta break an’ watch as the infection spreads.” He heard Ichimaru stand behind him, and he didn’t even turn as he heard the retreating footsteps. “Hurry up an’ finish, then I’ll re-dress yer wounds…child.”

The door clicked shut.