Urges

Well, it’s been a while since I’ve posted a chapter but here it is! Unfortunately, its not the chapter I had promised with Isshin acting like the fool he is, but this is something that wouldn’t let me go, so I wrote it. I think it fits. I could easily say that Ichigo is a little out of character, but I believe since we don’t ever see him in love and having sex, we don’t really know what he’s like in that state, thus, this is my version of him in love.

This chapter is also an experiment on writing Ichigo: the sappy fool in love. It’s a mixture Ichigo-esque things and poetic thoughts. I figure he’s 23rd in school, then he shouldn’t have an issue being poetic sometime, plus look at his Dad when he talks to the picture of Masaki! :)

Soundtrack:

All is Full of Love - Bjork
To Nowhere - .hack//Sign OST – Kajiura Yuki.

Much love to those who reviewed!

Urges 06 – Ichigo POV 3

There are moments when I’m in awe of Uryuu; ever since we got together, I’ve found myself staring at him at the strangest times. Such as when he’s reading a passage in class. I think it’s because I’m in awe of him.

Like now, as I look at him sitting on the bed. His bangs are pulled back onto the top of his head in a ponytail; it’s slightly mussed from prior activities, but it still has the usual smoothness and shine. What’s amazing about this familiar sight is the afternoon sun, making his hair shine a brilliant black. His glasses glint in the warm orange rays, making him look guarded. His mouth is pressed into a thin line of concentration. He’s wearing one of my long sleeve shirts, but it’s so large on his smaller frame, it hangs off his shoulder, revealing his milky skin. He’s wearing his cotton boxer briefs, sitting on the edge of the bed, painting his toenails a dark blue, roughly the same color as his eyes.

Most times I think he’s uncute with his superior attitude of Quincy hate Shinigami. It’s truly in these silent moments, like now, that I find him almost cute. I would say cute but I’m male and males don’t say cute.

Anyway, I think I find him most attractive like this, concentrating, yet content with a small grin that makes my heart skip a beat. I know I’m being sappy and poetic, but it’s really moments like this that makes me a lovesick bastard. But fuck, I can’t help it; he’s too sexy at times.

“Why are you staring at me, dumbass?” And then he opens his mouth. I won’t fall into his trap; he’s always looking for a fight. That’s why I ignore his now deemed rhetorical question and walk up and sit behind him with my legs on either side of him and my hands on his sides.

“What do you want and what did you do with the tea you promised to bring me?”

”It’s on the counter still.” I move my hands to his loser back, pushing his shirt up, touching his smooth skin gently. I give his shoulder a light kiss as I nuzzle his neck, giving me the opportunity to get a whiff of his scent, a very feminine smell with a hint of masculine.

“Why did you leave it in there?” He closes the polish, which in turn allows me more freedom to play.

“Don’t worry about it. I’m sure you’ll survive without for a little while longer.” I nip at his neck, smiling into it when his breath catches.

“Ichigo…” He whimpers when he tilts his head, revealing more skin for me to tease.

“Did you know that I think you’re beautiful?”

“Don’t say stupid things. Guys aren’t beautiful.” He hates it when he’s referred to as pretty or some other girly title. Unfortunately for him, I love to tease him every chance I get.

“Ah, you’re right, but you fit the category of beautiful. You’re not handsome; I am.”

“You may be handsome but you’re still an idiot.” I can see his hands gripping the sheets.

“But I’m your idiot.” I begin to nip at his ear, breathing hotly into it with heated arousal. That’ll get him. I tilt his head back and around and kiss him on his cheek. He turns himself more towards me and our lips meet with a quiet passion we’ve never experienced together before. The kiss is slow, almost sacred. Wrapping my arms around his waist, I pull him more comfortably into my lap. He immediately puts his arms around my neck, pulling me deeper into this kiss.

We moan into each other’s mouths at how fucking amazing this feels. This is completely different than any other time we’ve been together; it feels… special.

My hands begin to wander: first caressing his stomach then pushing up his shirt, allowing me access to his nipples. As I massage his nipple into a hard nub, my other hand is caressing just underneath the elastic of his underwear. He arches against my arm that’s wrapped around him, which inadvertently makes his perky ass rub against my thigh and graze my hardened length.

To stop my moan of arousal, I kiss him senseless, only taking a pause for a quick breath and to pull my shirt over his head. Once I throw the shirt across the room, I bend down and nibble at his nipples, tugging and licking them until he’s squirming against me, whimpering for me to stop and for more. I can’t help but chuckle at him because he looks like he’s in such agony, but what a sweet agony it is.

Today is really one of those days that make me want to be Uryuu everyday for the rest of my life. Hell, any day with Uryuu except when he’s on the proverbial rag makes me want to spend my life with him. I suppose over these past two months, I’ve come to really like him and cherish him. Before all the emotions got involved, we were just friends, rivals, people who like to fuck each other like rabbits; things changed and now I can’t even imagine not having his soft skin against me everyday. Well shit, in that case, It wouldn’t feel right is he didn’t insult me or give me his Quincy Death Glare No. 2, which is used to kill Shinigami instantly (Quincy Death Glare No. 1 is reserved for his father).

“Ichigo?” I snap out of my thoughts when I hear him saying my name.

“Hm?”

“Are you okay? You just suddenly stopped.” He places a hand on my cheek, stroking it gently with his fingertips. I feel a little bad because he looks so worried, but I can’t tell him exactly how I feel because I don’t know how he feels about me. I can’t say ‘I love you’ out of no where; it would probably make him close up and avoid me. I really want to tell him how much he means to me; my heart continues to urge me to tell him how I feel, but I have to hesitate until I know how he feels about me too. I guess I’ll just have to show him in the mean time.

Gathering him into my arms, I pick him up, kissing him once again and lay us down on the bed; I sit back on my knees between his legs and look down at him. With his lips all pink and everything, he’s really pretty now. I won’t say that to him unless I want a energy arrow through my head.

I give one last stroke down his torso, feeling the way his slight muscles play under my fingertips. I grab the elastic of his boxer briefs and start to pull them down; he helps by lifting his hips and putting his thighs together. Once I toss his underwear to some unknown spot on the floor, I grab hold of his left leg before he puts it down and pull it against my bare chest. I’m not exactly sure how, but he has no leg hair or body hair for that fact. I’m not sure how he managed to end up like that; perhaps his mother was hairless. Anyway, I run my hand down his leg to his inner thigh before placing a kiss on his calve. I place his leg on the mattress before settling myself between them on my knees, cradling his body against mine with my arms; I avoid crushing him by supporting myself on my elbows.

I dip my head down and peck him on the lips, staring into his confused azure eyes.

“Ichigo?”

“Shhh.” I go in for another kiss, only to be met halfway by eager lips and a tongue that can work small miracles in my mouth and on other select parts of my body. As our mouths meld together, I slip a hand between our bodies and press my finger into his entrance; he arches against me so hard, I think I hear his back crack. I stifle his unusually loud moan of pleasure with another mind-numbing kiss. I slowly massage his puckered entrance while distracting him with kisses that seem to leave him nearly unconscious due to lack of air. So maybe kissing him without allowing for air is a bad idea, but he makes me do it; he’s so damn sexy.

So, I sadly depart from his lips, moving along his jaw, nipping and licking as he arches up against me. Probing his heated canal, I search for his prostate.

“Fffuck!” There it is. I love how when I look down into his lidded eyes, he seems to me looking at me but not really, like he’s seeing beyond me, like oblivion. He looks so innocent like that; I would do whatever it takes to make that faraway look come again.

“Are you ready, Uryuu?” I whisper in his ear as I remove my finger from his stretched passage.

“Mmm-hmm.” He looks up at me, emotions and lust swimming through his eyes. I almost lose it. Almost. I’ve worked too hard on making this romantic and special to turn it into a fucking fuck-fest. Not that I really mind that much, it just that I’m trying to show how much I can restrain myself. I really need to let him know that this relationship isn’t just about sex.

So I unzip my jeans and pull out my throbbing member, something that has been severely neglected, but this isn’t about me; it’s about us. I get the tube of lube from the bedside table and prepare myself, all of this done with one hand.

I rest my arousal against his pucker, allowing excess lube to rub off on him; I can feel it contracting instinctively. Rubbing his thigh with the hand that was holding my penis, I help him relax. Soon he takes a deep breath, relaxing his entire body all at once. I use that as his signal that he’s truly ready.

I push my member into him slowly, watching his face for pain, which there was a brief flash of discomfort before his mouth drops open in a silent cry. I continue to push in, moving my guiding hand to help keep my body from crushing my boyfriend below me. I can’t stifle my own moan as his ass seems to swallow me into him until I’m in up to the hilt. We’re both sweating. Well, I sweat. He glistens.

As I stare into his eyes, I can tell he’s focused on me, especially when he smiles up at me and wraps his arms around my neck and pulls me in for a passionate kiss. The kiss is slow and extremely sensual. I unknowingly begin to thrust shallowly in and out of him, causing him to gasp at the friction. I try to make each thrust as smooth as possible; I slide in gracefully, roll my hips, and then slide out gracefully. With each roll of my hips, he puts his fingernails into my shoulders; that’s probably the most erotic thing that he’s done so far.

“Faster, Ichigo!”

“No.” He looks a bit surprised at my answer and for a moment, it looks like he’s about to whine about it. As soon as he opens his mouth to complain, I thrust in hard, stabbing his prostate directly. His eyes roll back as his head drops back onto the pillow, nearly screaming. Then I stop completely, just stay still feeling the instinctive contracting of his inner walls against my throbbing member.

“Ichi- I can’t… gonna…” Pausing mid-thrust, I wrap a hand around his member and squeeze, effectively cutting off his orgasm just as it is starting to overcome him. I don’t want it to end just yet. By his glare, I sure he wants this horrible, retched torture called making love over with. “Damn it! Let me come!” I think he’s really hot when mad too.

“Not yet. I’m not ready for this to end yet.” Fuck, I sound like a girl. In fact, Uryuu looks a little shocked and maybe a little guilty because he draws me towards him for a kiss, running his finger through my hair. Closing my eyes, I take this short break to relax into his touch and feel the rolling sensations coursing at the connection of our bodies. He’s sticky with sweat, but he smells like his soap and a musk that is only his; it’s intoxicating.

I rub my nose against his cheek as I try to take in as much of his aroma, gasping as his hands encircle my back and take residence on my ass, massaging it gently.

“Uryuu…” I pant a little faster and his caresses get to be more forceful, his hips thrusting up against mine, trying to get me to move again. I shake my head ‘no’ and peck on the cheek before sitting back on my knees.

“What are you…Ah!” I suddenly grab his waist, the really ticklish part I discovered a couple of weeks ago, a roll him to his side, creating this awesome friction on my excited member. I can only imagine how it feels for him. It must feel pretty good considering he has a white-knuckled grip on the sheets and biting his lip to stifle a moan. I grab his top leg and place it over my shoulder as I straddle his other leg, all without dislodging myself from him.

Caressing his inner thigh, I hold his entire leg against my chest as I begin to thrust shallowly. Turning my head slightly, I look at him from the corner of my eye and catch his eye and kiss his ankle. His toes curl beside my head. I can’t help but to smile at him with these strong emotions making my heart beat faster and harder for him.

Suddenly, my vision becomes blurry while looking at him. I stop thrusting once again and rub my eye. Pulling my hand away from my eye, I notice my vision in that eye has gotten better, but there’s wetness on my finger. These are tears? Why?

Uryuu pushes himself up onto his hands. “Ichigo, are you okay?” He reaches out and wipes the tears that just fell down my cheek from my other eye. “Why are you crying?”

I have to blink back more tears as I look at his concerned expression, my breath shuddering as my heart clenches in my chest, telling me to say what it feels.

I love him, but I can’t tell him. I don’t think we’re both ready for it. I don’t know how he’ll react to that. We really shouldn’t get too attached because we could die during the next fight with a hollow. That’s why I can’t tell him because I don’t think I could live without him.

I come back from my thoughts to feel Uryuu caressing my cheek, whispering my name. Ichigo. Ichigo. I grip his hand in mine, entwining our fingers together as I continue to stare into his dark blue eyes, amazed at their vibrant color. Smiling at him once again, I bring his hand to my mouth and kiss his knuckles. I can feel the backs of my eyes burning with tears, but I don’t allow the tears to fall; I’ve already made him worry about me.

“Uryuu, I… I…” How can those girls at school stand to give confessions; this is some hard shit. “I’m…” So maybe I can’t tell him directly, but I can say something that may not be as obvious. “I’m happy.”

He looks at me strangely, tilting his head as if he didn’t understand one of the two words I just spoke. Then his face lightens up with a smile I’ve never seen before; it’s a happy, bright sight, one filled with so much emotion it’s as if it may explode. He brings my hand to his mouth and slips the ring finger in, sucking on it gently, staring at me seductively.

Now this is different. He’s done this before, but this time, it’s done more out of arousal from my simple admission than lust. He slowly pulls my finger from his mouth and releases my hand completely; then he proceeds to shift as code for ‘Move’.

I comply happily, gripping his leg and thrusting in with heightened arousal. With each thrust, I can feel his emotions swell and his spirit energy rising higher and higher. He’s throwing his head back, looking for something more solid to grip as I thrust into him at a slightly faster pace than before. I can hear him whispering my name as the pace begins to turn to a more frantic pace as we near our long awaited orgasms.

Suddenly, his entire body clenches in on its self, his legs wrapping over and around me, his back arching forward, and lets out a cry that sounds like a combination of my name and ‘fuck’. He’s gorgeous when he comes. Unfortunately, I can’t dwell on that too much on that thought because my own orgasm strikes soon after his.

Between the pent up emotions and the intensity of the orgasm, the bright colors that usually burst in front of my eyes are now images, vivid images of every time Uryuu and I talked, fought, kissed, and had sex. Those images only spur on the insistent jerking of my pulsating member in Uryuu, filling him more than before with my seed. I groan his name over and over again, feeling the aftershocks of his orgasm tease my softening member.

I release his leg and limply fall down behind him and pull him back against my chest. We catch our breaths for a few minutes, letting our overheated bodies cool down.

“I’ve never seen you cry before.” Fuck. I was hoping he would leave it alone, but not Uryuu. What a buzz-killer.

“I don’t cry.” Swinging my legs around, I sit on the edge of the bed and bury my face in my hands. I know he wants to ask that question again, and I can guarantee that my mind and mouth can work together to hold in my feelings. “Fuck!” My heart burns so bad right now.

He jumps at my outburst, sitting up behind me. “Ichigo?”

How did I come to deserve such a wonderful person? I don’t understand why, how, or anything. I just know that I want him; I want to be with him. Fucking hell, I’m getting sappy like my old man...

Through the haze of my thoughts, I vaguely feel arms slide around my neck from behind me, encircling me comfortingly, calming me instantly. I bring my face from my hands, staring at the floor. Uryuu kisses the back of my neck, leaning his bare chest against my back.

“I’m happy too.”

I place a hand on his linked hands and smile.