Do Words Make a Bit of Difference?

I got really super drunk later that night, so drunk Kira had to carry my sloppy ass home, where he unceremoniously dumped me on my living room floor. I don’t remember much of the whole disastrous evening, but I’m pretty sure that after about my tenth sake, I loudly told a tale of lost love and humiliation. What I’m not so sure of is if I included names and incriminating details. Either way, I’m sure the gossips loved the spectacle.

Of course the next day, the oh-so familiar hangover came to call and I was glad that I didn’t have to report for duty that day. I had things to do, mostly involving the delivery of the crap I’d picked up for people while stationed in the World of the Living. I was not really feeling up to going out and facing the world and certainly didn’t want to brave actual daylight. Instead, I staggered into my bedroom, yanked off my stinky clothes, threw myself on the bed, pulled a blanket over my face and prayed for sweet, sweet death.

I must have fallen asleep, because the next thing I knew the light had taken on that honeyed tone it gets in the afternoon. I was parched, shaky and weak. Remedying any of that meant getting out of bed, a prospect that excited me about as much as reporting for duty the following day and facing my captain.

I carefully got up, found a jug of water and drank. Water ran down my face in rivulets, splashing my chest and making puddles on the floor. I could feel the water soaking into my desiccated body like I was a giant sponge. After rehydrating, I felt much better, but I smelled pretty rank. So did my whole place for that matter. Like a combination of rancid fish and stale sake farts. In other words, YUMMY.

I was mostly naked, a relatively common occurrence in any mans quarters during the sweltering summer months and I cracked the three doors to let in a cross breeze, hoping to drive off the stench and cool the place down a bit. I went out back to wash up and knocked on the wall separating my place from the Third Seat’s (my head just hurt too much to bother to check if he was there through other means) and shouted, “Hey, I’m going to be using the bath for a while. Give me about a half hour.”

I skipped the steaming hot water that was readily available for a soak in cool water. By the time I stepped out of the water, I smelled faintly like minty lime and my hair was squeaky clean. I felt normal-ish again. I tied a clean fundoshi in place and plopped on one of the lumpy pillows on the floor. I had a stack of crap mail to go through, stuff I’d neglected to open since I got back in favor of daydreaming about a possible future with Rukia and cleaning.

I’d been acting like a lovesick moron for long enough. It was time to cut my losses and accept that things with Rukia would probably always be strained. She’d be polite, but she’d undoubtedly tell me in not so many words to fuck off. Whatever, I was used to disappointment.

Besides, there were all sorts of platitudes to help me through this; better to have loved and lost, if you truly love someone set them free and then, of course, the ever popular: What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. In my humble opinion, whoever came up with that particular gem should have had their tendons cut and then been left to die on an ant hill.

I was pondering what other painful ways I would have dispatched that freaking moron, when someone knocked softly at my door sill. I felt OK, not like the world was going to end anymore and I was half expecting it to be Kira or maybe Iba come to mock me relentlessly for making an imbecile out of myself. I went into the bedroom, because lounging around in your underwear alone is all fine and dandy, but do it with a guy and you may need to evaluate what sex really attracts you.

“Come in!” I yelled as I pulled on my hakama, “I just need to throw on some clothes and I’ll be right out.” I heard the screen squeak as it opened. I contemplated throwing a kosode on, but it was just too hot.

I was pulling my hair back as I walked back into the living room. Rukia was sitting pretty as you please, munching on a plum, looking for all the world as if she belonged there. I looked down at my naked chest and went back in my bedroom for a kosode. Once I’d fastened the ties securely, I went back to the doorway. I rubbed my hand across the back of my neck and tried to think of something to say that didn’t start with ‘Why’.

“Does your brother know you’re here, Rukia?” I asked, as I walked over and closed the door.

“Nope, he sure doesn’t,” she said as she took the last bite of her plum. “Where can I toss the pit?”

“Has your aim improved?” I asked trying to push the hurt back down, trying to keep this encounter light. When she smirked and nodded, I knew she was thinking about all those times she’d tried to throw something at me when we were kids and had missed, just like I was. I pointed to the basket near the front door. She tossed the wet pit and it plopped right in the target.

“I’ve gotten better, huh?” she said with a sharpness to her voice that was hard to miss.

The ‘Why’ was right on the tip of my tongue and it was getting harder to avoid vociferating the word. Why, why, why?

“So, uh, why didn’t you just take what I offered Renji? Why did you have to make everything so complicated, so damn exposed? I mean, my brother knows something’s going on,” she sounded so exasperated, so affronted.

I’d forgotten her feelings in all the mess, I’d made it somehow just about my love for her. Selfish, I was a self-centered bastard. She looked at me with those big always-changing purple eyes and I felt like a complete and utter shit-heel.

“I just wanted to do the right thing, you know, trying to make it… I dunno, official. Guess I should have asked how you felt about that, huh?” What if she just wanted me for sex? What would I do then? Sex with other women had been OK, sometimes even fun during the act, but the after had left me feeling like I couldn’t get away fast enough; like I’d never had sex with any of them, just to them.

“Yeah, Renji, that would have been nice. What the fuck, excuse the pun, were you thinking exactly?” she was breathing heavily and her cheeks were flushed. How had I missed that she was completely pissed off, fuming at the ears? She got up and stalked over to me. She poked me in the chest, hard.

“That I didn’t want you to wake up in the morning hating me, leave and not talk to me for forty more years! I mean, last time we did anything like this you apologized for it, saying how much of a mistake it was and then totally ignored it. What the fuck do you want from me?”

“I wanted to get laid, Renji! I almost died- a virgin! I wanted to have sex with the one person I trust to…” she poked me hard in the chest, “to at least try to make it good for me. Do you have any what kind of awkward talk I had with my brother after you left?” I could tell she was trying to keep her voice down, but her volume kept spiking. I wondered how much the people around had heard already. Shit. I really hated when the gossip hounds focused on me.

“We can’t talk about this here, Rukia,” I said softly.

“Of course we can!” she raged.

“Uhm, well I guess we can, if you really want everybody to know our business in the next day or so,” I couldn’t hold back the smart-ass remarks anymore.

She paled slightly, but got that stubborn look on her face. “Come on, we’re going for a walk then. The woods, we’ll be able to shout there and no one will hear.”

That didn’t sound ominous at all, now did it? I thought. She was tying her sandals, as I just stood there. I didn’t really feel like traipsing through the woods, but knew that she wouldn’t let up until I agreed. I stomped over to my sandals and put them on.

“I’m going under protest,” I whispered to her back as she walked down the hallway.

When we were in the courtyard, she turned to me and said, “I don’t particularly give two shits", she said as if she relished using the profanity. "Come on.”

She shunpo’d off, over rooftops, a blur of motion in the distance in just a few seconds. I followed shortly, trailing behind her a bit. She stopped at the edge of the forest and waited for me.

When I stood next to her, she grabbed my hand and pulled me after her. I had no choice but to toddle along behind her. After a few minutes of getting whacked in the face with branches she went under easily, she finally stopped. There were trees all around us. It was pretty dim, since the canopy was rather dense and because the afternoon was waning, the daylight was getting softer.

She just looked at me, like she had when she was a kid and she was deciding whether to punch me in the mouth or kick me in the nuts. I really missed that. I mean, not the testicle-kicking, but that closeness, that feeling of knowing exactly what someone thinking at that moment. Weird, huh?

“He wanted to talk about marriage and kids and duties. He's barely so much as looked at me for forty years and now suddenly he wants to talk. About. My. Love. Life. I can’t believe you!” she said suddenly.

“Who?”

“Who? Who!? My brother! That’s who!”

“Yeah, well, exactly. Your brother! He’da killed me if I did that to you!”

“How would he have known?! It’s not like I was going to go home and say something stupid like, ‘Oh my gods, that Renji Abarai stuck to me good last night!’ I mean, come ON!”

“He’da known after ya got married and your husband found out that ya weren’t a virgin. It’s kind of a BIG DEAL ta those noble types!”

“Seriously? For one thing I’d just finished telling you that I wanted to have sex with your stupid ass. For another, I have not been even remotely interested in any of the dweeb faces my brother wanted me to set me up with. I’m not looking for some sort mutually beneficial alliance, connections or whatever. I’m not about to marry someone I don’t love! What, you think I would go and marry someone I didn’t? You do, don’t you! And here I thought you knew me so well.” She sounded disappointed. Hurt. Mad.

When she put it all together like that, I sounded like a total jerk. I breathed deeply, fighting for composure. “I just wanted to do what was right, Rukia. I didn’t want to put you in a position where you’d have to regret doing something with me later on. I just…”

“What? Decided the best course of action was to marry me? Without even asking how I felt? What is wrong with you?”

“I was trying to the right thing by you and trying to be respectful of your brother. Who is also my captain, a man I admire and respect tremendously. A man I wasn’t able to beat trying to protect you. I need him, Rukia, I need him to get stronger, so I can protect you next time!”

“If you admire and respect him so much, why don’t you just marry him!” she screamed at the top of her lungs. A flock of birds to the south startled and flew off. A ridiculous image of my captain in a feminine wedding kimono flashed in my mind and I tried not to smirk.

“You’re not being reasonable, Rukia,” I said calmly. Oops- complete tactical error on my part. I had forgotten how much she hated being called unreasonable. Her eyes froze over and her hand came to rest on her hip where her sword should have been as she walked over to me. Slowly, deliberately, as if she were a big cat and I was about to be lunch.

I took a few steps back and bumped into a tree trunk behind me. I couldn’t hear a sound as she stalked forward. She stopped inches in front of me and I leaned back into the trunk, trying to get a little more space between us. Her arm shot out and she poked me viscously in the chest. It hurt like a bitch.

“You.” She poked me again, “Are.” Another poke, “An.” A seriously hard jab, “IDIOT!” she screamed in my face.

I’d have a whole mess of round little bruises on my chest by nightfall and who knew how many more if this kept up. She raised her index finger again and before I had time to think, I grabbed both of her hands. She jerked them, trying to break my grip. I held on as tightly as I could, trying not to hurt or bruise her. It was getting harder and harder the more she fought me. With a twist of my hips and a roll of my shoulders, I switched our positions. She squirmed desperately and I pinned her arms over her head.

I stepped in close, shoving my knee between her thighs, effectively trapping her between my body and the tree trunk. I raised my knee so her feet were dangling off the ground and her face level with mine. “Sometimes I really hate you,” she practically spat the words.

“I know,” I answered.

I’m not sure who started the kiss, but that doesn’t really matter. One second she’s looking at me like she’s going to feed me my balls for breakfast and the next our mouths met with such force I knew we were both going to be bruised later.

Our teeth banged together and then she bit my lower lip. I moaned and her tongue slipped into my mouth. I sucked at the slippery appendage and pushed my body closer to hers. Her legs wrapped around my waist as she made these little sounds in the back of her throat. I let go of her hands and put an arm behind her to protect her back from the rough bark of the tree.

I snaked the other one inside the opening of her kosode. My hand scraped against the fabric wrapping her chest. I felt the swell of her breast under the tight fabric and her nipple harden under my touch. She writhed against me and all I could do was tear my lips from hers to grab onto her neck with my teeth. I dropped my knee and flexed my hips, needing more friction.

Her hands were busy doing something at my waist, something next to where her legs wrapped around my hips. I wasn’t sure what until I felt my hakama slipping down. I lifted my face from her neck and looked at her. Her eyes were shiny and dark. Her legs let go of my middle and she dropped to the ground, along with my hakama. Her hands went to her waist and she fumbled a bit with the ties at her side. I watched in a daze as the black fabric fell to the pine needle covered ground.

She delicately stepped out of the garment and untied her kosode. She shrugged out of that and dropped it in a heap on top of her hakama. She looked me dead in the eyes as she untied her underwear. Then she reached out and loosened the ties for my kosode. Time slowed as she reached up and pushed the shirt over my shoulders.

She looked at me from under her eyelashes and ran her hands down the skin she’d bared. Her movements were sure and steady as she picked apart the knot holding my fundoshi together. As soon as it was loosened, my erection sprang free and the relief was immense. She had that determined look again and it was just about the sexiest thing I’d ever seen. I bent down, scooped her up against my chest and kissed her. Her arms wound their way around my neck, holding me tightly as she pulled herself up and wrapped her legs around me again.

I could feel the heat of her body all over me, the wetness between her legs as she rubbed and wriggled against me. The kiss went on forever, gentler than the one that hard kiss that had started this, but still full of half painful nips and tongue. When she started to rhythmically shift and thrust with her hips, grinding her wet slit against me, I shoved her against the rough bark. I splayed my hand across her back and arranged my arm to protect her skin as much as possible.

The rough surface of tree bit into my arm almost painfully, a sharp contrast to the velvety texture of Rukia’s skin. Her breath was coming in harsh little pants under my lips and the movement of her hips took on a convulsive quality. I needed her, I wanted her, and I couldn’t stand the absence of her heat around me anymore. “Are you sure?” I asked quietly, my lips moving across hers as I formed the words slowly.

She nodded, tilted her head forward and to the left. I felt the silk of her lips against my ear and the tickle of her breath as she whispered, “Now, Renji.” I used my free hand to guide my head of my cock to the sweet damp spot between her legs. I pushed gently and eased forward, opening her the slightest little bit. She was tight and it felt like I would never fit. She sighed and bit my neck, making my hips jerk forward fractionally of their own accord.

I could feel the roughness of the bark scraping my arm to hell, smell the pine and mulch and her, sweet and musky and tangy. She was hot, so damned hot and I sank deeper, finally feeling my dick sliding in. Her sleek flesh just barely covered the head of my penis and then her teeth pierced my skin. The pain was a heavenly counterpoint to the intense pleasure. She was wet, dripping and smooth and I took a deep breath and plunged. I slipped in, momentum driving me forward till I couldn’t get any further. I was barely any further in, but something impeded my progress.

So tight, so hot, so wet. I want more. Just push a little bit harder. More. My vision contracted to a pinhole of white. I heard her keening, moaning. I felt her push against me, writhing. I’d heard it hurt for women the first time, but I’d never taken a virgin. What should I do? I felt hot liquid roll down my back and pool and drip from my clavicle. I felt her mouth against the hurt, her tongue lap against my skin.

I tried to pull out, but she held on. She ground against me, setting her nails into my skin. “No,” she said, “no, no, you will finish this. Renji, finish this.”

I pushed forward again and she tensed around me. I felt the moment her body accepted my intrusion, a sort of tearing sensation as I advanced into her. She squirmed, whined and the sounds made it even harder to concentrate. I looked down, we were completely joined, my cock seated to the hilt in her. I pulled out almost all the way and pushed back in, just watching how good we looked down there. She moaned and clawed at me. Sweat coated our bodies, making our skin slick. I could smell her all around me, there no trace of the forest surrounding us.

My whole world was her now, the sound of our bodies sliding against each other, the sensation of her all over me. Soft flesh so wet and warm, covered me; the slow retreat and thrust of our joining. The whole thing was a slow descent into madness, her sweet noises spurring me on. All of it was her. I was lost in her.

The pressure in my balls, the tight feeling in my lower spine told me I wouldn’t be able to hold on much longer. I wanted her to be right there with me. I thrust harder, faster, listened as her moans became longer and sharper. I fought for control and lost as she shuddered around me. I heard her call my name over and over as I emptied into her.

He legs released their vise-like grip from my middle. As she dropped I slid from her with a hiss. My legs turned to jelly and I couldn’t support my weight anymore. I dropped to a crouch in front of her and we both panted like we’d run a marathon. She put a hand on my head and said, “Next time, we do that in a bed.”

I would have laughed if I had the energy. She moved a few feet over and picked up her clothes. I heard fabric rustle. When I looked up, she’d managed to get her hakama on and was in the process of tying her kosode in place.

I was bone tired and now that the adrenaline was wearing off, I could feel various aches and pains. My forearm was a mess of scratches. I touched my shoulder and was surprised to see bright red blood smeared on the fingertips. “I didn’t mean to bite you so hard,” she sounded embarrassed.

“’S fine,” I said as I shrugged into my kosode. “I heal up pretty quick, so’s not a big deal.” I couldn’t deal with the fundoshi at that moment, so I just tugged my hakama in place and hastily secured them. I looked up at her and she was a mess. There was bark and sap in her hair, which was sticking up in every direction. Her clothes looked wrinkled. Her lips looked bruised and swollen. She looked like she’d just gotten thoroughly fucked. Not a good look for going home to the Kuchiki Manor.

“Uhm, d’ya wanta come back to my place? Ya could,” I looked away and rubbed the back of my neck, “clean up a bit. We could eat, if you’re hungry.”

“Yeah, I’d like that. I think I probably should at least try to make myself presentable before I go home.”

The trip back to my quarters was pretty painful. My legs were still gooey and all the little wounds I’d sustained were stinging and ripping from the movements of the shunpo. I was glad there was no one hanging around outside when we made it back to my place. I hoped the long shadows cast by the sunset would help obscure the view of anyone watching.

I closed the screen door behind us and took off my sandals. Rukia did the same and went to the cupboard and drank water straight from the jug. I looked away before I became too distracted by her to do anything. I lit a few candles against the incoming dark and then knocked on the wall like I’d done earlier in the day, “OK if I use the bath again?” When there was no answer, I felt around for his spiritual signature, and found nothing next-door, and figured he must’ve gone out for another night of drinking.

“Want a bath?” I asked Rukia. She nodded and I led her to my bedroom. I undressed her with care, marveling at each inch of skin that I revealed. I lingered over the puckers of the scars I’d barely noticed before, traced the wiry muscles I felt under her flesh. Then she did the same for me, making little sounds of dismay at each scratch and bruise I gotten, kissing old scars as she pushed off my clothes.

When we were both naked we just looked at each other in the flickering, ever dimmer light. I wanted the moment to last forever, but I took her hand and led her out back. The slatted floor was still a bit damp from earlier and stripes of gold light streamed through the offset wooden planks of the privacy screen. She looked amazing all tousled and well-used, the play of light and shadow accentuating her spare curves.

“Hot?” I asked as I twisted the nozzle for the water flow. She nodded and ran her hand across the tattoos on my back. I could feel my skin tightening under her touch, bunching into goose bumps.

When the water reached almost to the lip of the round wooden tub, I switched off the flow. I turned back to her and the look on her face was enough to make me rock hard again. She kissed my lips gently, sweetly and wrapped her arms around me. I picked her up and climbed the three steps to the tub. When I got in I slowly lowered us both into the hot water, she let go of my lips to hiss at the sensation of hot water closing around us.

I settled her on my lap, facing away from me. My bath basket was still where I’d left it earlier in the day, handily within reach. I slid my shampoo from the basket and squirted a bit of the fragrant liquid into my palm. She tried to turn around, but I told her to stay put. After I’d rubbed my hands together, I started carefully washing her hair. I messaged her scalp and watched as thick lather started to form. She arched and moaned softly, apparently enjoying my attentions.

I was getting more turned on the more I touched her, but it looked like the shampoo might drip into her eyes. I tilted her head back slightly and used a wooden ladle to scoop water out of the tub and rinsed the soap from her hair. She sighed softly and leaned back after I’d finished. I pushed her forward again and grabbed my sponge and soap, which I rubbed together. I dropped the soap into the basket, focused intently on her back. I could see her ribs and the knobs of her spine pressing out of her smooth skin. It worried me.

“Ya gotta take better care of yourself, Rukia,” I said softly as I ran the soapy sponge over her back. She was too thin, and I had barely noticed it. She leaned back again, squishing my hand between my chest and her back. She raised her hand, bent her arm backwards and caressed my face. “I’m serious,” I said as I pulled my arm from between our bodies. I shifted and pulled her closer. I trailed the sponge between her wonderfully shaped little breasts and felt my erection press against her ass.

She wiggled a little and the feel of her round buttocks caressing my cock was almost too much. Rukia must have known, because she chuckled deep in her chest. I let the sponge slide lazily over her skin, enjoying immensely the sounds she made as I made my way below the water and brushed across the tops of her thighs. The hand that had been caressing my face made a sudden grab for my hair as I dipped the sponge between her legs and swiped it down her nether lips.

She rolled her hips into the movement of my hand and as water splashed over the edge of the tub she said, “I want you again, Renji.” Gods, but I loved to hear her say my name like that.

I let go of the sponge and wrapped an arm around her middle to pull her lower body closer and up a bit. I used my other hand to position the head of my cock at her feminine opening. She whimpered a bit when I pushed her down and her flesh stretched to accommodate me. I didn’t like the thought that I hurt her and was going to slip out, but she shook her head, her wet hair rubbing against the crook of my neck. “No, don’t stop, it’s fine really,” she said quietly.

She squirmed and drove me deeper within her tightness. Water was being flung over the sides of the tub and I was sure that the splashes could be heard around the complex. I tried to keep quiet, to keep still, but the feel of her velvety skin all over me was more than I could handle. I bucked my hips, she pushed down at the same time, and I saw stars. She gasped loudly and I clapped a hand over her mouth at the same time as I bit my bottom lip to keep from crying out. I flexed my hips again and plunged deeper inside her. I felt her mouth work under my palm and heard the muffled sounds she made.

I really, really wanted to last, to take her to the highest plains of excitement, but the sensation of her body, her scent, even the water was too much and I knew I’d come soon. She undulated and more of the soapy bathwater slopped over the side. It felt too good and I couldn’t contain myself anymore. I tightened the grip I had on her middle and pounded into her. She writhed on top of me, made a sound deep in her throat.

I felt a fluttering around my dick, deeply grateful that she was about to come since I felt the pressure building in my balls and in that familiar feeling in the small of my back. My field of vision narrowed and I stopped hearing the sloshing of the water, hearing only her, feeling only her. She arched her back and moaned long and low as her inner muscles clasped me tightly, rhythmically, milking semen from me.

Just as she sagged against me I heard a loud bang from my Third Seat’s apartment. As much as I wanted to sit in the cooling water, revel in the feel of being inside her and her skin against mine, I slid my other arm under her and stood up quickly. My still semi-turgid penis slipped out of her. I carefully got out of the tub and tiptoed down the steps and the short distance back inside and closed the door. We were dripping water everywhere, but I didn’t mind.

“Abarai!” the Third Seat’s voice intruded as I’d known it would, “I’ve told you over and over, fuckin’ empty the damn bathtub when you’re done, asshole!”

“Sorry!” I yelled back as I tossed Rukia on the bed and grabbed a towel. “D’ya wan’ me ta empty it now?”

I heard him grumble as I tossed the grinning girl kneeling on my bed another towel, “Don’t bother, dick breath. I got it.”

I latched the backdoor and finished drying off. Rukia was trying to contain her laughter, her small boobs bouncing delightfully in the dim light. “What has ya so frickin’ amused, huh?” I whispered as I climbed into my bed.

She smirked and asked quietly, “How does he know you have dick breath?”

I sniggered. My bed felt damp and smelled like my soap. I crawled over to where she’d propped herself up against the wall. Her legs stretched out in front of her as she lazily rubbed the towel on her head, jumbling her hair as she dried it. It was kind of strange to see the girl/woman I’d loved for so long naked, in my bedroom, on my bed. I’d wanted it for so long, I wondered vaguely if the whole thing might have been a dream, a lifelike one, but still unreal.

“Pinch me,” I said suddenly as I heard water gurgling down the drain outside.

She complied readily, grabbing my nose, squeezing it between two delicate fingers and asked “Why?”

“Afraid it might have been a dream or somethin’,” I whispered as I laid down and put my head in her lap. She stroked a hand through my half wet, half dry hair and I let my eyes drift shut. My guard was down and I was happy for the first time in ages. I could hear the splash of water hit the sides of the wooden tub, and figured my neighbor wouldn’t be able to hear much of anything over the sound. I ran one hand gently over the downy tufts of her public hair, enjoying the feel of her against my fingers. She was warmth, wetness, fragrance. She was everything I wanted and needed in one tiny, too thin, exquisitely lovely package.

I rolled off of her and knelt beside her. She just looked at me as I leaned closer, bracketing my arms around her, bracing myself against the wall behind her. I kissed her, softly, gently; swallowing the sounds she made. Her arms wound their way around my neck and her hands buried themselves in my hair. The kiss was twisting tongues, the soft pressure of lips, suction and it seemed to last forever. It still wasn’t enough. I wondered if it ever would be.

When she pushed me away, I was disappointed. Her face was flushed and her breath came in ragged pants. It was fully dark outside now, and the only light illuminating her face came from the flickering candles in the other room. She looked as disheveled as someone naked could, her hair framing her face in strange clumps, and a blush creeping up her chest to her neck.

“I…” she drew the sound out, as she tried to smooth her hair. I dropped my hands and sat back, waiting for her to finish what she was trying to say. “I, uhm, need to get back,” she finally said. She scrambled off the bed quickly and I tried not to feel the hurt pulsing in my heart. I watched as she grabbed her clothes from the floor and started to dress.

Her movements were jerky as she yanked her hakama into place without bothering with her undergarments. She stuck her arms into the kosode and tied the sash tightly across her abdomen. She looked at me from under her absurdly long lashes after she was completely covered. I couldn’t read the expression on her face as she quietly said “Thank you, Renji.”

There was so much I wanted to say, but all the words stuck in my throat and I stared uselessly at her back as she left. My front door creaked and she was gone.

Goodbye, Rukia.

~*~

The chapter title is a song by a band called Murder by Death- who I adore, but I don't own the song or make any sort of cash from it. Check out the song- I think it really suits the feel of this particular part of the story.

I just want to take a quick minute to thank, yet again, SexyBleach and Polymer for their really super reviews. It definitely kept me working on this when I should have been doing more mundane and less fun things, like cleaning and laundry.

I needed a cigarette after writing that, let me tell you. And a good, stiff, uhm, drink. It was way more difficult than I anticipated. As well as quite a bit longer. I debated on splitting it in two, but decided to go with plonking the whole lot if it in one chapter. I kept going back and changing this and tweaking that, but all in all, I'm fairly pleased with the final result. Although, really, it's not just about what I think, it's about what you, the reader, thought. Tell me... I'm dying to know.


Fuego! lyrics- (yes, it took me weeks to add them, but hey... I love them!)

She walked with fire at her heels.
The scent of smoke on the breeze.
Wherever she goes that's where I'll be.
Whatever she wants that's what I need.
Baby, it's been so long that even the roses hips are turning me on.
Baby, it's been so long.

I want you.
I want you.

The heat floats on top of our skin.
Like an ice cube in a glass of gin.
I can't even hear the words you say.
I need to leave, but I want to stay.
Baby, it's been so long that even the roses hips are turning me on.
Baby, it's been so long.


I want you.
I want you.

I get the feeling if I stay with you, you'll never let me go.
I want you.

Feel like a ship on dry land.
Or an island in the sand.
Your kiss is cool, despite the heat.
You've got my senses beat.
If I stay, I won't last long.
You've got a hold on me so strong.
I hear your song.
All I hear is your song.
It's so hot.
The bones show through our skin.
It's so hot.
That the bones show through our skin.