Guilty Pleasure

Author's Note: This is my first Bleach story. It's taken me forever to write and I knew if I didn't finish it this morning at nearly 3 am my time, then it wouldn't get done at all with a summer semester at college and such. This is a yaoi crack pairing, Uryuu Ishida and Ulquiorra Schiffer. It is also AU, just to add to the madness and it is pretty much PWP. I hope I didn't make them too out of character, of course that is bound to happen in a AU fic, so if they are out of character then I apologize as this was just too good an idea to pass up to me. There are hintings to other pairings in here, graphic sex, and some language. I hope I did alright. If it goes over well, it might get continued.

I would also like to thank Samurai Smee, as without her encouragement, I would have never done this! So I hope this is up to standards!

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or its characters, nor the title of the fic or the lyrics at the beginning. This is also rated M for graphic yaoi or m x m sex and if you don't like, then please don't read.


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Guilty Pleasure

I came here to make you dance tonight, I don’t care about my guilty pleasure for you

-Guilty Pleasure by Cobra Starship

Uryuu Ishida didn’t dance. He didn’t like to dance. He didn’t like to drink. In fact, he didn’t seem to like much of anything except sewing and being antisocial.

So then what the hell was he doing at a club, with dancing, and drinking?

He pushed his glasses up his nose and tried to figure out the same thing as he surveyed the club scene. Alcoholic glasses sparkled like jewels in a sea of people as the music assaulted his ears and people rubbed his body.

He was left standing alone, his friends among those strange people, enjoying their pagan customs and drinks. How did I let myself get talked into this? Oh right, Ichigo.

He glared in the direction he thought he had seen the orange-haired youth disappeared. It would have been more trouble to go looking for him. Nevermind, he has probably had too much sake by now and I would have to wade through those people.

Uryuu sighed as he turned back to the bar, pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose. He ordered just water, to be safe. He didn’t trust the bartender anyway.

What did the gang really expect him to do in this setting? He couldn’t study or sew. They had mentioned he needed the night off, but why? He didn’t understand. Why invite him to a place that he had no business or expertise in?

Because he wasn’t as stubborn as he liked to think.

He sipped at the cooled liquid from the plastic bottle, hardly allowing it to touch his thin lips. He debated on just leaving and wondering if they would notice. There were plenty of things he could be doing instead of wasting time looking at people, who mostly looked the same.

Even he looked similar to the people around him. He could go mostly unnoticed with his simple white button down shirt and khaki pants. He looked like he had just come from the university; actually he had when Ichigo and the gang grabbed him.

I should be studying for tests next week, not wasting my valuable time here. What would my father say? His father wouldn’t say anything as he was probably spending time with Isshin Kurosaki.

That is, until he spotted someone.

He was dancing all alone in the middle of the floor to the heavy beat. He tossed his head, sending silky black hair above his face, so that his bright green eyes were clearly visible in the semi-lit room. Uryuu nearly dropped his water bottle.

His hair hung in black layers around his face, nearly hiding the long green marks he had coming from his eyes. His paper-white skin reflected the lights of club, his black eyeliner absorbing any light at all.

He tugged at the simple black choker around his neck as he lowered his head and let his hair fall in his eyes. He moved his slender arms above his head as he began to jump around a little.

His fishnet shirt reflected muscle with every small movement and his black pants left nothing to the imagination. It would have appeared that the rest of him was just as pale as his face. For someone so tiny, he was actually quite toned, the shirt accentuating this.

He ran his slender fingers through his sweaty hair, shaking his head and jumping slightly out of time with everyone around him. Uryuu could see anxious faces around the young man, but he heeded them no mind as he danced and danced, losing himself in the music.

By any definition, he was beautiful.

Uryuu was strangely mesmerized by the young man. He had never thought about being attracted to men, or really anyone of either sex. Then why this man? He couldn’t answer himself.

The man on the floor lifted his head in Uryuu’s direction, flashing a wane smile as he tossed his head again, this time for Uryuu to join him. He looked around, unsure of if the man was motioning to him or not. The guy smiled again and this time Uryuu knew it was for him only.

He left his water bottle at the bar, heading on the floor. People brushed into him as he passed, touching him in different places, but he paid them no mind as he continued to his single destination.

“Were you motioning to me?” he asked as he shouted over the din of the music, pushing his glasses up his nose. The guy nodded, his hair falling in his eyes again. He grabbed the other man around the waist, pulling him close to the thumping music.

Uryuu moved unsurely with him, having never been asked to dance by anyone. He felt clumsy and heavy against the lighter young man, who was wiggling and grinding against him. He just couldn’t figure out why the man picked him out of everyone else at the club.

He couldn’t ignore the dirty looks of the other couples around them. He awkwardly held onto the waist of the slightly shorter man, staring into his brilliant emerald eyes. They were exactly like jewels as they put him under a spell.

“What’s your name?”

“Uryuu,” he said, leaning in, his hot breath against the other’s ear just to be heard.

“Uryuu hm? Call me Ulquiorra for now,” the other man said as one of his slender hands cupped the back of Uryuu’s head, drawing him close. He ground his crotch into Ishida’s, looking up at him with a rather emotionless face.

He liked the way the name rolled off Ulquiorra’s tongue. His voice was calm and actually rather seductive, even though he had only spoken a few words.

He could feel himself growing turned on with every beat of the heavy bass thumping in their ears and in their chests, pulsating through them like water.

“Just lose yourself in the music,” Ulquiorra told him as he shook Uryuu’s head for him, his beautiful fingers tangling in the pristine straight locks. The pressure felt wonderful, though Uryuu wouldn’t admit it at the time.

He wrapped his arms around Uryuu’s neck, making him sway in time to the music, their slender bodies rubbing together. The Ishida was sure people were watching, but he couldn’t bring himself to part eye level with the emerald jewels before him.

The faintest hint of a smile played on Ulquiorra’s lips as he opened his mouth and moaned softly when they ground together. He unbuttoned the top of Uryuu’s shirt, his fingers touching the soft flesh.

“I didn’t know I could dance like this,” Uryuu told him.

“Now you do. But how about we ditch this floor for a little while?” Ulquiorra asked. “It’s getting rather heated out here.”

“Sure,” Ishida agreed. Ulquiorra grabbed his hand and together they pressed through the crowds back to the bar. He could see the bartenders sizing them up, the one from before with spiky blue hair winking at them.

“Can I buy you something to drink?” Ulquiorra asked Uryuu, turning those spell-binding green eyes on him. Poor Uryuu couldn’t resist him. It would have been completely impolite to say ‘no.’

“Yes,” he nodded.

“What will you have?” the bartender asked, having to nearly stand on the bar to be heard over the current song. It was yet another one that Uryuu didn’t recognize.

“Two sake,” Ulquiorra told him, pinning down some money. He gave a rather shy smile to Uryuu as the bartender turned over the drinks.

“Be gentle with that one,” he called after them. Uryuu wondered if the man next to him was a regular. From the way the bartender acted, he was. He found himself being led away from the bar, toward a darker part of the club where a few shady and shitty tables were.

They sat down at a table closest to the bathrooms, Ulquiorra being sure to sit as close to Uryuu as he could. They were both sweating and their arms stuck together.

“Drink up,” he said as he tipped the liquid back. He did it so easily, so flawlessly that Uryuu found himself just watching the liquid make its way down his throat, his adam’s apple bobbing and twitching, signaling it had left his mouth.

Remembering the glass in his hand, Uryuu tipped the alcohol back, hoping it would loosen him up enough to talk to this beautiful man without his mind getting in the way.

He put the cup down, a hand covering his mouth, letting the alcohol make its way through him. He felt light headed, although he knew the alcohol hadn’t taken effect yet. He looked to find Ulquiorra watching him, a hand resting on his thigh.

Feeling brave, he ask: “Do you have a last name Ulquiorra?” He pushed his glasses up his nose.

“Mhm,” he pressed his thin, pale lips together before saying “Schiffer.” It rolled off his tongue and Uryuu thought that he could have listened to the emerald eyed beauty speak all night. He vaguely wondered how he would sound, moaning his name.

“That’s a nice last name,” Uryuu told him, feeling awkward again. This was like the first day of school all over again, only better looking.

“What about you Uryuu?”

Pressing his sweaty glasses up his nose, he replied “Ishida. Uryuu Ishida.” He was beginning to feel warm, but only half of it was the alcohol as the other part was Ulquiorra moving his hand up Uryuu’s leg.

“Interesting.” Ulquiorra began to move some of Uryuu’s hair out of the way, pressing his gentle lips to the skin of his jaw. He could feel his pants tighten some as his breathing hitched. He could smell the sake on his breath. “Have you ever been with a man before?”

“No,” Uryuu answered.

“Would you like to be with me?” He turned Uryuu’s head so their eyes met and their lips were inches apart. It didn’t take Uryuu a half a second to think it over.

“Yes, I would like that.” Ulquiorra smiled as he closed his eyes and brought their lips to meet. Uryuu could taste the alcohol on them and wondered if his tasted the same. The kiss was simple at first, but then it grew heated as Uryuu slipped his tongue past the other’s lips.

His mouth was warm and supple, his tongue battling against Uryuu’s lightly, their alcohol-fueled saliva mixing and swapping. Uryuu’s hands reached up and cupped Ulquiorra’s cheeks as his thumbs brushed over the smooth and pale skin.

Ulquiorra’s fingers tangled in Uryuu’s hair, pulling his closer, pressing their lithe bodies together. There was real passion and instant fire between them. Soft sighs and moans could be heard in the surround area as they both enjoyed the intimate contact.

“Let’s take this somewhere else,” Uryuu said, afraid that they were being watched. He wasn’t sure if the club had policies on such things like public displays of affection, or sex with clothes on for that matter, but he didn’t want to find out.

“The bathroom?” Uryuu nodded, as it was the closest place. They connected at the hands again as they entered the rather grim surrounding. There was hardly anyone in there, yet, which was a surprise.

They grabbed the stall nearest to the back, pressing together in the tight space. They ignored the dirty writing on the walls as their lips met again for another sensuous kiss.

Uryuu tangled his fingers in Ulquiorra’s layered black locks as his kissed the slightly shorter man passionately. He couldn’t seem to get enough of that pleasant mouth. Ulquiorra gripped his shirt at the waist, his fingernails almost reaching through the white fabric.

They knew they had limited time as someone could walk in at any moment. Uryuu sat down on the toilet, bringing Ulquiorra with him. Schiffer was cleaver enough to put his feet up on the stall walls so that it appeared only one man was occupying the space.

He bounced slightly on Uryuu’s lap, rubbing against his hardened cock, feeling the arousal. Soon enough, that would be inside him. His green eyes closed as his mouth opened in pleasure.

“Mm Uryuu,” he moaned quietly. Uryuu was holding him around the waist as Ulquiorra’s arms wrapped around his neck. Uryuu moved his fingers to start working on the other’s pants, undoing them easily.

He could feel Ulquiorra’s hardened member ready to spring out from its confines within the tight faux leather pants. Uryuu reached his hand in, grasping lightly and stroking. He could feel a few drops of pre cum on his hands as he pumped slowly, keeping his mouth over Ulquiorra’s, drinking the sounds of pleasure in.

His thumb rubbed over the slit, drawing more liquid out of the swollen head. Deciding to take a chance, he lifted Ulquiorra off of him, propping him against the wall as he let the pants fall around his knees.

He unzipped his own tightening pants, pushing them and his underwear off his hips as soon as he could. He placed his fingers in the tight ring of muscles in Ulquiorra’s ass, pressing in slowly, stretching and scissoring the entrance.

He gave his own cock a few pumps, smearing the pre-cum around for lubrication before he thrust into the tight space. Ulquiorra was tight and Uryuu was sure he had never felt something like this. He was a little unsure of how to proceed.

Ulquiorra was pushing back against him, trying to give him a hint. He pulled out slowly, just like he imagined it would be with a girl, pushing himself back in. The other man slid back, encouraging him on.

Uryuu continued, working at a steady pace, pushing his hips in and out of Ulquiorra. He grasped him around the waist, taking his cock into his hand and pumping in time with his thrusts. Ulquiorra began moaning as he backed up to meet the faster thrusts.

Soon enough, both of them were grunting and moaning, their sweaty skin slapping together as the thrusts got faster. Uryuu knew that he was near release, but he wondered about Ulquiorra.

“That’s it,” he encouraged in the other man’s ear, lightly kissing his shoulder. “Come for me.” A few seconds later, Ulquiorra cried out loud enough that Uryuu was sure the dance floor outside could have heard him, his orgasm spilling over the wall and their hands in white arcs as he arched against Uryuu.

Ulquiorra’s orgasm sent Uryuu over the edge as his thrusts grew erratic and he came inside of the other man, the white seed covering Ulquiorra’s backside, sliding out of his hole. They panted, Uryuu resting his head on Ulquiorra’s shoulder.

“Would you like to feel like this?” Ulquiorra asked quietly.

“Are you up to it?” The slightly shorter, dark haired man nodded as he smiled shyly at Uryuu. They switched places, so that Uryuu was against the wall this time. They listened for a few moments, trying to figure out if anyone was in the bathroom with them, but there was no one yet.

Ulquiorra stretched Uryuu’s entrance, like had been done to him moments before, and then slid his quickly hardening cock inside. Uryuu gasp from the pain, digging his fingernails into the stall wall, and biting his thin lower lip.

“It only hurts for a little while,” Ulquiorra whispered in his ear as he nibbled on his ear. He waited a few seconds before he began to slide out, sliding in slowly again. Poor Uryuu wasn’t sure what he had gotten himself into at first.

That is until a slower pace later when Ulquiorra brushed his prostate, sending a pleasant shiver all the way through his body from his head to his toes. He threw his head back and moaned, hoping his glasses wouldn’t fall off his face completely to the dirty floor.

“D-do that again,” he moaned, trying to back against Ulquiorra. The other man smiled, even though Uryuu couldn’t see him as he complied.

Before so long, Uryuu could see why Ulquiorra enjoyed it as much as he did, as his prostrate was brushed against and targeted dead on. He felt Ulquiorra’s hand grasp his cock and he allowed his hand to join so that he could experience his second orgasm.

Their made the wet slapping sound again as Ulquiorra pounded in to him. Uryuu hadn’t thought the slightly smaller emerald-eyed man would have it in him, but he was wrong, very wrong as he began to feel over the edge.

He managed a strangled cry as his orgasm hit him, uncoiling in his stomach and beginning to arc out of his body onto the wall in front of them, mixing with from earlier. He let his head fall back against Ulquiorra’s shoulder as the other man began to orgasm as well, filling Uryuu up with his hot seed.

This time, Ulquiorra sat on the toilet seat with Uryuu in his lap, both of them breathing heavily and sweating. Before they had time to clean up, the bathroom door opened and Uryuu was forced to place his feet up on the walls.

“Hey Ishida! Are you in here?” he heard Ichigo yell. They watched the set of sneakers come toward the one occupied stall. “Ishida, that you?”

“No,” Ulquiorra answered smoothly. “No Ishida in here.”

“Oh, sorry man. I guess I’ll just have to try his cell phone later or something.” Ichigo walked out and Uryuu put his feet back down. It was hard not to laugh. Why had he even bothered to put them up? Ichigo wouldn’t have found him just by his shoes anyway.

He turned around to look Ulquiorra in the eyes, saying “Thank you.”

“No big deal,” the other man answered casually. They cleaned up as best they could, neither man speaking, each knowing that soon they would have to part if nothing else were done.

“You know, if you would like, I have coffee at my apartment,” Uryuu answered, not wanting to leave the gem at the club. Ulquiorra looked up at him, with those soulful eyes that Uryuu could just melt into.

“Is that an offer to spend more time with me?”

“If I say yes, will you come along?”

“Yes.” He gave a rare full smile, the lines on his face turning a little. He took Uryuu’s offered hand as they exited the bathroom and the club into the dark night. Maybe Ichigo has a good idea every now and again, Uryuu thought as he pushed his glasses up his nose with his free hand.

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Author's End Note: Like it? Love it? Hate it? Mistakes? Constuctive criticism, that's constructive not destructive as this is my first fic? Review.