what i never say

What I did'nt say: (Renji oneshot/lemon)
A/n: this is a random oc story that i wrote... cause i felt like it.
Disclaimer: i don't own bleach and i don't make money from writting fanfiction.
Warnings: cussing, hentai, fingering, oral, the usual and my bad grammar and spelling.
Have you ever been to stubborn to admitt that you loved someone? You just let them slip through the cracks? You expect your actions show your love and them to know it. Only if you would have said those 3 little words, that mean the most... This how I lost the love of my life to some other girl! And now I'm going to fight to get him back.

LEMON PART DON'T READ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IF YOU DO, DON'T REPORT ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OR I'LL GO JET LI ON YOUR ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ENJOY THOSE WHO WANT TO READ. IT'S EASY TO SKIP USE A THING CALLED A SCROLL BAR OR USE YOUR ARROW KEYS, LOCATED TO THE RIGHT OF YOUR KEY BOARD!!! THANK YOU AND ENJOY
- Td =(00)=' (sweatdropping kitty!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

(lemon flash back scene) (warning you I suck at this so bear with me)
Renji backed me up to the wall and cornered me.
"You know what's going to happen?" Renji taunted with a smile.
I flashed a cocky smile of my own. "I don't know what you mean, Lieutentant Abarai."
"You know by all means Hiroki," he said with that cocky grin, that I love so much.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and locked my legs around his waist. I caught him in a passion infused kiss. I was going to show him what I meant.
Renji responded back, by forcing his tounge into my mouth. A whimper of pleasure escaped my throat, as I kissed back, our tounges meeting in a passion filled battle. We made our way to my purple covered bed. Renji dropped me on the bed. My purple hair seemed to mix in with the blanket causing him to laugh.
"Come and get me big boy," I taunted, jesturing with my index finger.
He chuckled and climbed on top of me, crushing my breasts to his well toned chest. I moaned in delight at the welcomed pressure.
He made quick haste stripping me of my dark red tank top, leaving me only in my light green bra with neon stars.
"Nice choice of underware you got there," Renji joked
I rolled my eyes and had to laugh at the dork.
"You dork," I laughed.
"I'll show you what this dork can do Hiroki," He purred sexually
I blushed at my named being metioned in that way.
He laughed. "Whats the matter shy Roki?" he taunted.
"Just hurry up and fuck me," I said, in a deadly duo of sexual frustration and passion-filled bliss.
He smiled and laughed harder.
He started a wet trail of kisses from my forehead to my neck. He found my weak spot and bit on it tenderly.
I moaned and squimmed, feeling the passion rush through my veins. I saw stars rush through my closed eyelids.
He continued his path from my neck to my cloth encased breast.
He groped them as if test the weight, he teased my nipples untill they were hard as nails.
I closed my eyes and moaned and grasped the blanket.
He put my cloth covered breast into his mouth, switching between them for about two minutes.
It felt like a enturnity of tortured bliss to me.
He finally removed my bra, the shock of his mouth touching my naked breasts sent waves of pleasure to my area inbetween my legs.
He bit down on one of my nipples causing my eyes to spring open, me to moan in sheer delight.
"Mm Renji," I moaned.
He smirked and continued the tortured wet trail of kisses down to my navel, tirwling his tounge around it.
He kissed a trail back up my body and to my ears.
He took my sensitive earlobe into his hot mouth and nibbled on it. I moaned.
"Do you like this Hiroki Amaia Kisuke?" he taunted.
"Yes," I answered in a moan.
He chuckled and continued his path down with his hands. They found their way down to my shorts and yanked them off.
He slipped his hand into my matching boy short undies and teased my area.
His finger slowly touched my bud of pleasure. (god I've read to many romance novels!)
I moaned and purred and arched my back off the bed.
"Aw did I find somthing you liked," he breathed continuing his nibbling on my ear lobe.
"Nnna Oh god Renji!" I moaned.
He found my enterence and stuck a finger in, I moaned and my gold eyes snapped opened, again.
I started to pant as he slipped my undies off. I was close to my orgasm state.
He withdrew his finger, to taunted me.
"You bastard, you tease, don't fucking dare leave me hangin'!" I roared my voice laced with passion.
He chuckled. "Moan my rank Hiroki,"
"Never," I said stubbornly.
He laughed and traced my area of desire with the tip of his finger.
I moaned and finally gave in. "Lieutenant Abarai!"
"Good girl," He stated slipping his fingers into me.
I groaned and went over the edge of the pleasure obiss.
I gushed all over his fingers.
He brought them up to his mouth and licked it off.
"You taste good, babe," he stated.
I blushed and my body temperature rose another 60 degreezes.
"Your turn big boy," I growled pushing him over.
I got on top of him stripping him of his Soul Reaper Uniform Kimono.
I made a wet trail of kisses down his neck, to his nipples.
I bit down on one of them causing him to growl and groan in pleasure twisted pain.
"What's wrong Renji can't take the heat?" I taunted.
He glared at me.
I kissed his nipple and continued to lick them. I got bored with that moved my tounge down to his six pack, man was this boy ripped! I kissed his chest and licked the edge of his navel.
He arched his hips up something poked me in my face.
"Looks like little Renji wants to play," I joked.
He moaned, turned on at this point beyond bliss.
I pushed his hips down and stuck my hand inside his boxers toying with his member.
"Stop it, you tease," he moaned.
I looked up at his chocolate passion clouded eyes.
I yanked his boxers off kissed my way down to his member. I took it into my mouth and started to suck it as if there was no tomorrow.
He moaned and arched into my mouth, causing me to choke. I slid my mouth off of him and went back at again, catching my breath. I got all of him into my mouth and continued to suck and suck untill he came with a hoarse moan.
I drank all of his seed up in one gulp. I guess having a big mouth, served its purpose.
Renji pinned me to the bed and entered me with a sudden passionate rage.
I moaned and moved my hips with his.
"Harder," I commanded.
He went harder
"Faster," I moaned
He went faster.
He hit my spot and I moaned.
He brought his hand down to tease at my bud causing me to moan more.
He wrapped my legs around his waist, making him go deeper.
"I'm going to--" I moaned
"Go ahead baby," Renji growled in my ear
We both reached our peaks.
"Renji!!!!!" I screamed, I swear China could have heard me.
We both colasped on to the bed. We both were panting, trying to catch our breathes.
"That was good," I stated.
"I love you Hiroki," he stated.
I smilled, yet it was my turn to say those 3 or 4 words. I choked. They were at the tip of my tounge, they did not budge.
"Do you love me Hiroki?" he asked desperatly searching my eyes.
"Uh, I don't hate you," I stated.
He glared at me.
"So you don't love me?" he growled getting out of bed.
"Um-um-um-" I stuttered.
"Um what Hiroki? Are you saying that these last 9 months has been nothing but a sex quest for you?" he raged hurt.
"Renji!" I stated.
"No Hiroki! You don't get it! I love you with all my heart and I don't fall to easily," he rampage hurt.
My eyes widened. He really did love me! How could I not say those words back? I was not afraid to get hurt.
"You know what Hiroki, you're a total user, a bitch!" he stated causing my heart to crack.
He threw his clothes on in rushed hurry and marched towards the door.
"Wait Renji!" I shouted.
"I'm tired of waiting Hiroki," he stated.
His hand met the door knob turning it.
"I love you," I stated.
"Isn't a little to late for that Hiroki?" he questioned.
"I'm breaking up with you," he growled slamming the door with such force.
It knocked over my heart shaped glass jewlery box, making it break into two. So did my heart as if it was the box.
6 months later:
I was slowly getting over Renji leaving me. I stared at the stack of paper work infront of me.
"Cheer up Hiroki," a very pregnant Vallon stated.
"Oh I'm fine Captain," I lied taking a breath.
"Ya right Hiroki, I can read minds remember." she said, tapping her temple.
"Ya I forgot," I stated.
She rolled her purple eyes at me.
"You're such a dork Hiroki, you got the day off," she stated, guestering towards the door.
"Before you leave, take these papers over to the Soul Society, to the 6th division," she stated.
I froze, Renji was the lieutenant for the 6th division.
"Okay captain," I stated.
I flashed stepped over to the Soul Society, tieing my badge to my arm. So that they would know that I was and allied oragnization. It also showed my rank and divison. I changed out of my kimono, into a netural grey one.

I made sure that my sword was well sheathed on my side. I fingered with the ribbon, attached to the ball of the sword. I sighed and waited in pure boredum.
I was stopped by a black haired girl.
"Who the hell are you?" she asked.
Well she's rude!
"I am Lieutenant Kisuke, on impotant business, to the sixth division." I said abruptly.
I just wanted to get this over with without anymore pain.
"Oh you're the girl that broke my boyfriend's heart!" she shouted angerly.
There went the old-almost-healed wound opening up again. I guess he went after his old best friend.
"Yes I am Lieutenant Abrai's exgirlfriend, now let me pass," I stated, hating the title that I was forced to use.
She moved aside and let me pass.
"Thank you," I stated.
She glared at me as I made my way down the path.
I skipped down the path to the Squad Six barracks. I knocked on the office door and waited for it to slide open.
What seemed like and enturnity the door finally opened. I looked up and saw Renji towering over me, I was after alll 5 foot.
"Hello Lieutenant Kisuke," he said cooly
I wanted to punch him for acting so calm!
"I met your new girlfriend," I stated off topic.
"Yes she is a lot better than you, she actually says I love you without being told to," he mocked.
Now that was a low blow to the heart!
"Ya, so who cares," I said tears threating to spill over my eyes.
"Here's the papers that you need!" I stated, shoving them into his hands and running off.
"Hiroki wait," he said.
I turned around and stopped in my tracks.
"What Renji!" I growled.
"You're quite pathetic," he stated.
"What do you mean by that?" I retorted.
"That you need to get over me Hiroki. I don't love you any more and I move on to bigger better things," he stated.
My heart lepted and fell into a jumbled up mess. Renji could be an ass when he wanted to. I knew the blunt of that effect, right now.
"Ya, well go Fuck off!" I shouted, sprinting into a fast run.
He was just standing there shocked.
I ran with tears blinding my eyes I flashed stepped and ran smack dab into Soi Fon.
"What the hell is your promblem?" she asked rudely.
"Nothing Captain Fon, just let me pass," I whimpered.
"Oh what is your promblem Hiroki?" she asked.
"Just old boyfriend business is all," I said nochalantly.
"Oh, well you better be off kiddo," she stated.
I nodded and waved bye to her. She was a good friend on my mom,Yoruichi.
I darted along the path of the Soul Society, looking for somthing to destract me from my thoughts of him. This was starting to get bad! It was like I was obsessed with him, as if I was some type of stalker. Like the Papparazzi to Lindsey Lohan. I glared at my mind and tried to shake off my thoughts about him.
I still would try to get him back, but it was to late, he found someone else.
I was stopped dead in my tracks, when a Zanpaktou shikai was activated.
I look behind me and see Rukia standing there.
"Leave my boyfriend alone!" she shouted, nearly hitting me with a gust of snow.
I jumped up and did a flip to dodge the attack directed my way.
I slid on the rooftops and landed infront of her.
"Listen Rukia, I am not after Renji you can have him," I stated.
"Ya well not anymore," she said bitterly, swinging another attack my way.
I dodged, this was seriously getting old!
"Pour Night Rain Dagger!" I called releasing my Kobiki form( A/N i'll put some files up explaining all of this stuff.)
"What do you mean by that?" I asked.
"You're smart, he broke up with me!" she shouted attacking me.
"Oh please like I believe you," I said with disbelief.
She rolled her eyes and put her sword up. "Actually,I broke up with him, Hiroki," she stated.
"I thought that you were mad at me Rukia," I said with disbeilef.
"I was for like ten seconds and then got over it." she stated.
"Then why did you attack me?" I asked annoyed.
"To test your reflexes," she remarked.
I glared at her and had to laugh.
"Ya, well they're quite good," I stated.
She laughed. "Do you want to hang out, and we will device a plan, to get your man back," she stated.
I nodded and hugged her. "Thanks Rukia I could kiss you,"
"I'm not lesbian though," she stated.
"Neither am I unless I get drunk," I said, staring at the sky.
"Huh?" she asked confused.
"Nevermind," I stated.
"Oh,"
"Well what's the plan?" I asked.

Later that Night:
I was walking towards the squad six barracks dressed in Renji's favortie outfit of mine. A pokadotted dress that went down and flaired at my knees. It was spagetti strapped. It hugged my figure perfectly and showed off my curves. He always said that I looked like a beautiful model.

I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw Renjii there, shirtless and training. The sweat glistened off his muscles, making his tattos stand out even more. His hair was up in that same damn pineapple-like fashion. Just watching him train set fire inbetween my loins. I really did miss him and the sexual tension between us was about to get ripe. I hadn't had sex in 6 months, since he left me that very night.

Renji's POV
I turned around and saw Hiroki there in the dress that she only wore for me. I knew that she hated dresses with a passion. Yet she seemed to like that dress, as much as I did. It did so much for her body it hugged all of her lush curves.
I was still angry with her, she after all broke my heart into 2. She walked towards me with her head down and her normal hyper foot steps, calm and broken
Did I break her heart? Does she really still love me?
Probally not she just wants a quick lay.
"Renji can I talk to you?" she asked in a broken tone.
"Ya sure Hiroki whatever you want to say," I said nonchalantly.
Back to normal POV:
"I well am sorry for what happened 6 months ago," I stated, looking down at the ground trying to gain the courage to say those 3 little words that mean the most!
"Ya so what Hiroki I've move on and it's time for you to move on too," he stated.
I looked at him with my golden eyes, tears started to brim over.
"What's your damn problem, Hiroki?" Renji barked.
"I Love you," I said.
He stared at me with disbelief. "You what!" he shouted.
"I love you! I always have, I was to stubborn to admit it. I love everything about you, even your over stubborness. I love the fact that you always knew what I felt, even when I denined it. I love how you care so much. I love how sensitive, sweet, nice, strong protective person you defend all those that you care about. I love the fact that your temper gets in the way of your logical thinking. I love--"
"I get the damn point Hiroki! So you do love me?" he asked.
"Yes you big fool! I always have and I always will. You're the hamburger to my bun." I stated childishly.
Tears poured from my eyes hitting the ground, causing a wet indention.
Renji looked at me to. "I love you to, Roki," he stated.
I smiled through my tears and hugged him.
He hugged back and kissed my forehead. "You know what kiddo?"
"What?" I asked looking up at him.
"When you cry your eyes look like butterscotch," he stated.
I smiled and laughed. "Always about food,"
"I want you," I stated randomly.
His eyes widen. "My room," he gestured to his door.
I nodded and followed him to his door. He crushed my tiny body to the door, with his big one.
"Now what Renji?" I asked.
"Take off your dress," he stated.
"Hello Renji we're outside," I stated.
He nodded and opened his door letting me in. Renji had a cute and little apartment, mine was bigger and more girly. But hey who cares.
"Now take off your dress," he comanded.
"Your wish is my comand sire," I joked.
He rolled his eyes.
I stripped off my dress leaving me in a a pokadotted bra and undies.
"Do your underware always have to match?" Renji asked.
"Yes they do," I stated.
"Women," he muttered.
I started to undo his kimono, leaving him in his SpongeBob boxers. (something random) that I got him.
"Oh so you like your boxers," I stated.
"Ya whatever just fuck me," he stated.
ANOTHER LEMON WARNING!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREAT UP TOP STILL APLIES!!!!!!!!!! =(^ /// ^ )= (happy kitty)
I pulled his boxers down and kissed my path down to his chest and landed near his cock, I licked the tip as if testing it. He moaned in approvall.
I snickered.
"You're my bitch tonight," I stated.
He looked at with concern.
"I mean I'm in charge, no bondage," I stated.
He nodded and closed his eyes again.
I continued sucking on his cock, I deep throated it and sucked on it like it was a lollypop. Renji grasped my hair really hard.
Hey buddy that's attached!
He came inside my mouth with a hoarse cry. I drank all of him up and licked my lips.
"You taste good hun," I stated.
He blushed and looked at the ceiling, I pushed him on the kitchen table. I really don't know why the kitchen.
I climbed on top of his member, taking it in my area and started to ride him rough and hard.
Renji started moan like crazy, right when he flipped me on all fours.
"Renji I'm not a-" I moaned.
"What were you going to say Roki?" he asked.
"Nothing," I stated.
He led his hand down to my swollen lips of my womanhood and teased my bud. I started to moan louder. I felt my peak comming extremely quickly.
"Nna fuck me harder and faster then you ever have before Renji!" I shouted in passion, causing him to smirk.
"Okay," he stated increasing his speed. He screwed me so hard, that I thought that the kitchen table would break from the force of the weight. I started to moan more frantic, my orgasm getting closer.
"Renji I'm goin to come," I moaned.
"Just let it happen kiddo," he stated.
I came and the orgasm racked me to the core.
He climaxed right after me colasping on me.
Crack!
The table colasped under our weight.
Renji and I started to laugh like crazy.
"Yep looks like you owe me a table Hiroki," he stated.
"Okay, its worth it," I stated.
"Love you Hiroki," he stated.
"Love you too Renji," I stated.
He smiled and kissed my forehead.
I got those 3 little words, that I never say out.
The end
Author's Note: I would like to thank Saving Jane for the insperation for the oneshot from their song.